Don't Get the Wrong Idea

Album Cover of the Day

2012-01-24T12:13:00.000-06:00

This little oddity of "experimental sound" from 1953 comes from M-O-R, Easy Listening producer/arranger Gordon Jenkins and is somewhat famous for its inclusion of the song "Crescent City Blues" sung by Beverly Mahr, from which Johnny Cash lifted the melody and several verses for his "Folsom Prison Blues." A substantial cash settlement between Jenkins and Cash was reached in 1969 after Jenkins filed suit for plagiarism.

Incidentally, the "7 Dreams" of the LP are narrated by jazz bassist, Bill Lee, who was Spike Lee's father.

Crescent City Blues

Gordon Jenkins, 1953 (as sung by Beverly Mahr)

I hear the train a-comin, it's rolling 'round the bend

And I ain't been kissed lord since I don't know when

The boys in Crescent City don't seem to know I'm here

That lonesome whistle seems to tell me, Sue, disappear

When I was just a baby my mama told me, Sue,

When you're grown up I want that you should go and see and do

But I'm stuck in Crescent City just watching life mosey by

When I hear that whistle blowin', I hang my head and cry

I see the rich folks eatin' in that fancy dining car

They're probably having pheasant breast and eastern caviar

Now I ain't crying envy and I ain't crying me

It's just that they get to see things that I've never seen

If I owned that lonesome whistle, if that railroad train was mine

I bet I'd find a man a little farther down the line

Far from Crescent City is where I'd like to stay

And I'd let that lonesome whistle blow my blues away

Album Cover of the Day

2012-01-17T07:42:00.000-06:00

Happy 70th birthday to The Greatest!

My Muhammad Ali story . . . when I was in college a loooong, long time ago, it was announced that Muhammad Ali was coming to our university for a speaking engagement. I don't remember the particulars of the affair he was to attend but I do know that it was something that I was not going to be able to go to, for whatever reason.

The rumor mill had it that Ali was scheduled to arrive on campus mid-day and would be making the rounds of various sites, buildings, etc. I decided to cut my classes that day and take up home base at the student union, sitting on the steps in front of the building, pacing up and down the street outside, just hanging out in hopes of seeing Ali and his entourage wandering through the campus. Ali was my hero. He had been so from the first Clay-Liston fight when I won 25 cents betting on him with my friend, John. My man!

I was unsuccessful. I didn't see him. Didn't see the feintest sign of his presence. Ah, well.

Later that evening, I ran into a friend who came running over to me, grabbed my shoulder and said words to the effect of 'Dude, where the hell were you today for class?' We had a class together, Social Science 101, a light, fluffy omelette of a class aimed at liberal arts majors and education majors as a justification for the 'well-roundedness' of their education. It was a lecture format held in a large auditorium with, I can't remember, 100-200 students perhaps.

It turns out that . . . and you're probably way ahead of me on this by now . . . Muhammad Ali had come to my Social Science 101 class and was the guest lecturer that day.

I was crestfallen. It wouldn't have taken an Ali uppercut to knock me over. A feather would have done nicely.

My luck. Typical.

Happy birthday, Ali. Boomaye!

The white Don King?

2012-01-13T11:23:00.000-06:00

I saw this photo and immediately thought, "Jesus Christi, it's the white Don King!" and then I . . . slowly . . . realized . . . what I was looking at.

Ah. I see now.

Those who've passed, 2011

2012-01-09T13:35:00.000-06:00

The Grim Reaper was a busy S.O.B. in 2011. We lost some great ones. We lost some dickheads, too. (Good riddance to Osama bin Freaking Laden!)

Please take a moment to read through the lists below and give a moment’s reflection to those who have, as my good friend Kinky Friedman would say, gone to Jesus.

Richard Winters, 92 – Commanding Officer of Easy Company on D-Day, featured in HBO’s “Band of Brothers”
Alberto Grenado, 88 – rode motorcycles with Ché Guevara
Jack LaLanne, 96 – fitness guru, the toughest hombre on the planet, even at age 96
Mietek Pimper, 91 – concentration camp inmate who compiled Schindler’s list
Wilson Greatbatch, 92 – inventor & owner of 325 U.S. patents including the implantable pacemaker, long-life lithium battery and a solar-powered canoe
Barry Bremen, 64 – The Great Imposter
Dr. Bruce Dan, 64 – first to link Rely tampons with Toxic Shock Syndrome
A.C. Nielsen Jr., 92 – market research and TV ratings king
Brian Rust, 88 – father of modern discography
Barney F. Hajiro, 94 – oldest living military Medal of Honor winner
Norma Lyon, 81 – butter sculptress
Julius Blank, 86 – built the first computer chip manufacturing equipment
Dorothy Young, 103 – Houdini’s stage assistant
Sidney Radner, 91 – curator of Houdini’s artifacts and personal collection
Wilma Lee Cooper, 90 – pioneer of mountain music
Frank Buckles, 110 – last WWI doughboy
Augustus Owsley Stanley III, 76 – far-out man; far out, man!
Frank Neuhauser, 97 – first National Spelling Bee winner, 1925 (winning word: gladiolus)
Ed Zigo, 84 – police officer who arrested the “Son of Sam” killer
Ralph Lomma, 87 – put the windmills on miniature golf courses
Harry Coover, 94 – invented Super Glue
Knut, 4 – German-born polar bear and international media superstar
Milton M. Levine, 97 – invented the Ant Farm
Edgar Tafel, 98 – last surviving apprentice architect to Frank Lloyd Wright
John H. Sinfelt, 80 – chemical engineer who pioneered unleaded gas
Jane Scott, 92 – world’s oldest rock and roll critic (Cleveland Plain Dealer)
Joe Cooper, 87 – founder of the Yorkshire Ukulele Circle who debunked the infamous Cottingsley Fairies photographs
Karl Slover, 93 – trumpeter and one of the last surviving Munchkins
Oscar Griffin Jr., 78 – Pulitzer Prize winning journalist who took down Billy Sol Estes
George Ballas, 85 – invented the Weed Eater
Albert Brown, 105 – oldest survivor of the Bataan Death March
Claude S. Choules, 110 – last known Australian combat veteran of WWI and devout pacifist.
Joanne Siegel, 93 – model for Lois Lane, wife of Superman creator Jerry Siegel
Ron Patterson, 80 – created the Renaissance Fair concept
Gerald A. Lawson, 70 – invented the interchangeable video game cartridge, essentially destroying adolescent outdoor activities forever
Hubert Schlafly, 91 – invented the teleprompter
Alan Haberman, 81 – championed the U.P.C. bar code
Paul J. Weidorfer, 90 – hero at the Battle of the Bulge, winner of Congressional Medal of Honor, 2 Purple Hearts and a Bronze Star
Wyatt Knight, 56 – Tommy Turner in Porky’s, self-inflicted gunshot
Irving H. Franklin, 93 – developed the batting glove for baseball players
Robert Whitaker, 71 – photographer, shot the infamous Beatles’ Butcher Cover
Bill Tapia, 103 – the Duke of the Uke
Carle Oglesby Jr, 76 – 60s radical leader of the SDS, author, musician, Carlos Castaneda & JFK Assassination scholar
Jim Rodnunsky, 54 – developer of the cable-cam used in outdoor sporting events
Rudolf Brazda, 98 – last “Pink Star” concentration camp survivor
Bill Haast, 100 – snakehandler supreme
Keith Tantlinger, 92 – invented the modern cargo shipping container
Wayne Mainer, 104 – country-bluegrass finger-picking banjo pioneer
Clarence Charles Adler, 98 – mon oncle

And, lest we forget, from the worlds of:

1. Vaclav Havel, 2. Wilma Lee Cooper, 3. Jackie Cooper, 4. Susannah York, 5. Wally Yonamine, 6. Ferlin Husky, 7. Pete Postlethwaite, 8. Howard Tate, 9. Marvin Tarplin, 10. Suze Rotolo, 11. G.D. Spradlin, 12. Jane Russell, 13. Madame Nhu, 14. Sir Henry Cooper, 15. Ollie Matson

BUSINESS, POLITICS, SCIENCE, SOCIOLOGY

Donald Tyson, General Vang Pao, Judy Bonds, Sargent Shriver, Dagmar Wilson, Charles Kaman, J Paul Getty III, Bill Monroe, Russell W. Peterson, James McClure, Kim Hill, David Broder, Carel Boshoff, Warren Christopher, Pierre de Beaumont, Leonard Weinglass, Geraldine Ferraro, Ellen McCormack, William Young, Jean Bartik, Ned McWherter, John C. Haas, Mike Campbell, Bosko Radonjic, William Schaefer, Jess Jackson, Madame Ngo Dinh Nhu, Bill Cook, Moshe Landau, Richard Cornuelle, Robert Ellsworth, Burt Reinhart, Leo Kahn, Murray Handwerker, Wallace McCain, Jeff Gralnick, Joseph Wershba, Edward H. Harte, Huguette Clark, Mark Haines, Albert Sack, Bill Clements, Dr. Jack Kevorkian, Ali Abdullah Saleh, Otto von Hapsburg, Betty Fox, Joko Beck, Betty Ford, Juan Bordaberry, Geoff Fisken, Adm. Noel Gayler, James T. Molloy, Nguyen Cao Ky, Elliot Handler, Warren Leslie, Milton Gwirtzman, Elmer Lower, Robert C.W. Ettinger, Hugh Carey, Mark Hatfield, John Teets, M. Kenneth Oshman, Nancy Wake, Eleanor Josaitis, Bob Sherman, Joey Vento, Stetson Kennedy, John Cullen, David Reynolds, Eleanor Mondale Poling, Vito Perrone, Charles Percy, Owsley Brown II, Wangari Maathi, Kenneth Dahlberg, Milan Puskar, Steve Jobs, Rev. Fred Shuttlesworth, Edgar M. Villchur, Muammar el-Qaddafi, Morris Chafetz, Robert Pierpoint, Manfred Gerlach, Allen Bernstein, Andy Rooney, James Van Doren, John R. Opel, Tom Wicker, Odumegwu Ojukwu, William Waller, Svetlana Stalina Alliluyeva Peteres, Robert Whistler, Christopher Hitchens, Kim Jong Il, Vaclav Havel, Norman Krim, George Gallup Jr.

SPORTS

Cookie Gilchrist, Ryne Duren, John Rice, Emory Bellard, Chuck Tanner, Bob Rush, Tom Carnegie, Joe Frazier, Gus Zernial, Ollie Matson, Dave Duerson, Ron Piché, Drew Baur, Spook Jacobs, Duke Snider, Cecil Kaiser, Gino Cimoli, Dave Sisler, Woodie Fryman, Greg Goossen, Wally Yonamine, Frank Chirkinian, Drew Hill, Marty Marion, Rick Martin, Nikolai Andrianov, Gil Clancy, Jim Seymour, Stanley Bogdan, Larry Shepard, Amy Applegren, Lou Gorman, Homer Smith, Grete Waitz, Joe Perry, Mason Rudolph, Lynn Chandnois, Sir Henry Cooper, Erhard Loretan, Seve Ballesteros, Robert Traylor, Ron Springs, Sammy Wanjiru, Harmon Killebrew, Bill Summers, Paul Splittorf, Joe Steffy, Andy Robustelli, Margo Dydek, Pauline Betz Addie, John Henry Johnson, Jim Northrup, Genaro Hernandez, Nick Charles, Lorenzo Charles, Billy Costello, Preston Carpenter, Mike Mitchell, Papa Joe Chevalier, Mel Queen, Carlos Pascual, Mika Myllyla, Armen Gilliam, Dick Williams, John Mackey, Chris Cahill, Don Williams, Butch Lewis, Hideki Irabu, Kent Hull, Jeret Peterson, Sherman White, Don Chandler, Scott LeDoux, Pete Pihos, Carl Hanford, John J. Kelley, Mike Flanagan, George Hendry, Lee Roy Selmon, Betty Skelton, Sam DeLuca, Dave Gavitt, Lenny Lyles, Pete Gent, Mike Heimerdinger, Al Davis, Mateo Alou, Bob Forsch, Joe Frazier, Roger Christian, EdMacauley, Walt Hazzard, Joe Lonnett, Jamie Pierre, Ron Lyle, Greg Halman, Vassily Alexeyev, Betty Danoff, Jim Rathmann, Joe Restic, Harley Sewell, Sean Collins, Houston Antwine.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Pete Postlethwaite, Anne Francis, Jill Haworth, Ellen Stewart, David Nelson, Peter Yates, Paul Picerni, Susannah York, Don Kirschner, Wilfrid Sheed, Reynolds Price, Bruce Gordon, Charlie Callas, Tony Geiss, David Frye, Peggy Rea, Davie "Poppa Neutrino" Pearlman, Brian Jacques, Tura Santana, Maria Schneider, Lena Nyman, Charles Sellier, Michael Tolan, David F. Friedman, Kenneth Mars, Betty Garrett, Len Lesser, Dwayne McDuffie, James McClure, Bill Nimmo, Jay Landesman, Jane Russell, Gary Winick, Annie Girardot, Walter Zacharias, Mike DeStefano, John Haines, Al Morgan, Michael Gough, Gabriel Laderman, Elizabeth Taylor, Lanford Wilson, Richard Leacock, Farley Granger, George Tooker, Wayne Robson, Keith Fordyce, Sidney Lumet, Hedda Sterne, Mark Hall, Charles Laufer, Arthur Marx, Ross Hagen, Marie France Pisier, Sol Saks, Madelyn Pugh Davis, Michael Sarazin, Tim Hetherington, Chris Hondos, Robert Vickrey, Ernesto Sabato, Bill Blackbeard, Harry Jackson, Dulcie Gray, Jackie Cooper, Marian Mercer, Jack Adler, Arthur Laurents, Sada Thompson, Dolores Fuller, Bill Gallo, Mary Murphy, Pam Gems, Randy Savage, Bill Skiles, Barbara Stuart, Bruce Ricker, Philip Rose, Steve Rutt, Jeff Conaway, Clarice Taylor, James Arness, Wally Boag, Betty Taylor, Leonard B. Stern, Laura Ziskin, John Neville, Gunnar Fischer, Bob Banner, Tom Wilson, David Rayfiel, Alice Playten, Peter Falk, Gene Colan, Don Diamond, Charles Dubin, , Edith Fellows, Anna Massey, Dolores Hope, Shelby Grant, Cy Twombly, Sam Denoff, Sherwood Schwartz, Roberts Blossom, T. Lux Feininger, Armando Orsini, Lucian Freud, Thomas Aldredge, Linda Christian, Polly Platt, G.D. Spradlin, John Wood, Roman Opalka, Andy Whitfield, Francesco Quinn, Gualtiero Jiacopeti, Robert Breer, Frank Dileo, Frank Potenza, Sybil Jason, Cactus Pryor, Cliff Robertson, Jordan Belson, Eve Brent, Richard Hamilton, John Calley, Frances Bay, Robert Whitaker, David Z. Goodman, Mo Rothman, Steven Mueller, Emanuel Litvinoff, Bil Keane, Doris Belack, Diane Cilento, Charles Napier, Sue Mengers, Michel Peissel, Piri Thomas, Barry Feinstein, Norman Corwin, Dan Frazer, Barbara Kent, Patricia Breslin Modell, Leonard Stone, Sid Melton, Hal Kanter, Theadora Van Runkle, Les Daniels, Ken Russell, John Neville, Judy Lewis, Patrice Lamumba O'Neal, Alan Sues, Bill McKinney, Harry Morgan, Jerry Robinson, Bert Schneider, George Whitman, Dan Biggers, Joe Simon, John Chamberlain, Robert Easton, Helen Frankenthaler.

MUSIC

Gil Garfield, Gerry Rafferty, Jack Towers, Margaret Whiting, Bobby Robinson, Phil Kennemore, Mark Tulin, Grady Chapman, Trish Keenan, Georgia Carroll, Bobby Poe, Milton Babbitt, Charlie Louvin, Gladys Horton, Tony Levin, John Barry, Margaret Price, Gary Moore, Emanuel Vardi, Alex Napier, Don Rondo, Doc Williams, Aimee Leonard, James Phillips, Ham Guerrero, Joan Bonham, Eddie Galvan, George Shearing, John Strauss, Helen Gathers, Terry Clements, Eddie Serrato, Suze Rotolo, Eugene Fodor, Eddie Kirkland, Johnny Preston, Monte Owens, John Pickering, Rick Coonce, Mike Starr, Bernard Lee, Joe Morello, Jack Hardy, Jean Dinning, Danny Stiles, Bobby Phillips, Hugh Martin, Ferlin Husky, Bob Marcucci, Nate Dogg, Melvin Sparks, Pinetop Perkins, Zoogs Rift, Ralph Mooney, Ken Arcipowsky, Jet Harris, Loleatta Holloway, Ronnie Hammond, Todd Cerney, Big Jack Johnson, Don Hill, Lee Holby, Ray Herr, Bill Griggs, Carl Bunch, Harley Allen, Roger Nichols, Eddie Burriss, Bill Pitcock IV, Billy Bang, Randy Wood, Kent Morrill, Phoebe Snow, Max Mathews, Hazel Dickens, Poly Styrene, Huey P. Meaux, Joe Pennell, Gerard Smith, Tom King, Gil Robbins, Mary Robbins, Deacon Anderson, Norma Zimmer, Cornell Dupree, Speedy West, John Maus Walker, Nigel Pickering, John Du Cann, Bob Flanigan, Snooky Young, Lloyd Knibb, John Carter, Joseph Brooks, Leonard Kastle, Gil Scott-Heron, Ray Bryant, Andrew Gold, Benny Spellman, Martin Rushent, Mark H. Smith, Larry Wild Man Fischer, Mack Self, Carl Gardner, Clarence Clemons, Jerry Mayo, Steve Popovich, Alan Rubin, Buddy Gask, Kevin Kavanaugh, Frankie Toler, Fred Steiner, Mike Waterson, Mark Vaccacio, Ron Foster, Ruth Roberts, Charlie Craig, Rob Grill, Cory Smoot, Michael Wurzel Burston, Alfonso Mizell, Kenny Baker, Travis Bean, Jerry Ragavoy, David Carr, Joe Lee Wilson, Amy Winehouse, Dan Peek, Frank Foster, Chuck Ruff, Gene McDaniels, Fran Landesman, Milly Del Rubio, Sidney Cooper, Gil Bernal, Marshall Grant, Fred Imus, Conrad Schnitzler, BIlly Grammer, Jani Lane, Jerry Leiber, Nick Ashford, Ross Barbour, B. Jeff Stone, Esther Edwards, Jack Hayes, Glen Croker, Honeyboy Edwards, George Green, Jack Neal, Christopher Small, Wardell Quezergue, Frank Driggs, John Larson, Sylvia Robinson, Johnnie Wright, Jessy Dixon, Leonard Dillon, Marvin Tarplin, Country Johnny Mathis, Harry "Cuby" Muskee, Clarence Johnson, Roger Williams, Piero Weiss, Bert Jansch, Donald Banks, Daisy DeBolt, Paul Leka, Buddy Sharpe, Joel DiGregorio, Pete Rugolo, Charles Hamm, Fred Ferrara, Gene Kurtz, Keith "Johnny Dee" Landers, Reese Palmer, George Mojo Buford, David Rea, Heavy D, Doyle Bramhall, Andy Tielman, Jimmy Norman, Lee Pockriss, Mark Moogy Klingman, Laura Kennedy, Paul Motian, Andrea True, René Morel, Ross McManus, Barry Llwellyn, Kristian Schultze, Paul Yandell, Russ Garcia, Gary Garcia, Andrew Kazdin, Hubert Sumlin, Keef Hartley, Don DeVito, Bob Burnett, Dick Sims, Barbara Orbison, Chico Edwards, Philip Burrell, Bob Brookmeyer, Billie Jo Spears, Ralph McDonald, Pupi Campo, Sean Bonniwell, Euclid James Motorhead Sherwood, Sam Rivers, Clem DeRosa, Dan Terry, Kaye Stevens, Robert Bobby Purify Dickey, Danny DeGennaro, Barbara Lea.

Read 'em and weep. Raise a glass. Say a prayer. Long live 2011.

2011 in review - The Marimba Awards

2012-01-04T11:11:00.000-06:00

It’s done. It’s over. Kaput. Finito.

Goodbye 2011. You will be missed. By some. Not so much by others.

Time for the annual Marimba Awards. Without further ado and as a final adieu, the best, worst, most/least interesting of 2011:

PERSON OF THE YEAR: Edmund Finney, seeker of life’s truths.
Runners-up: Ron Paul, Louis C.K., Nicholas Volker, Chuck Lorre.

VILLAIN OF THE YEAR: Charlie Sheen, he of tiger’s blood.
Runners-up: Jerry Sandusky, Japanese earthquakes & tsunamis, Harold Camping, the Euro, Rupert Murdoch’s News of the World.

FUN COUPLE OF THE YEAR: DeMaurice Smith & Roger Goodell, ballers.
Runners-up: Kris Humphries & Kim Kardashian; Tim Tebow & God; Georgetown University’s men’s hoops team & the Bayi Military Rockets; Jarrod Shulz & Brandi Passante.

SPORTSPERSON OF THE YEAR: Novak Djokovich, giant slayer.
Runners-up: Dirk Nowitsky, Brianna Amat, Aaron Rodgers, Justin Verlander, Shaka Smart, Abby Wambach.

BABE OF THE YEAR: Pippa Middleton, royal sis.

Runners-up: Poppy Montgomery, Lea Seydoux, Nikkie Reed, Olivia Wilde, Zoe Saldana.

PRISONER OF THE YEAR: Rod Blagojevich, hirsute scumbag.
Runners-up: Jila Karamzadeh Makvandi, Michael Lohan, T.I., Lindsay Lohan.

MUSICIAN OF THE YEAR: The Breakers (have I ever mentioned that all the good music these days comes from Scandinavia?)
Runners-up: Adele, Rebecca Black, Dave Grohl, Florence Welch.

SPOUSE OF THE YEAR: Sinead O’Connor, quickly bored.
Runners-up: Ashton Kutcher, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Kris Humphries.

MEDICAL CONDITION OF THE YEAR: Royal Wedding mania.
Runners-up: radiation poisoning, the Cult of Oprah, salmonella.

DRUG OF THE YEAR: Vemurafenib.

Runners-up: Avastin, measles vaccine, saw palmetto, iPhones.

PEOPLE WHO JUST NEED A GOOD PUNCH IN THE NOSE:
Patti LaBelle, Rick Perry, Floyd Mayweather, Sting, The Situation, Rex Ryan, the pepperspray cop.

MISUNDERSTOOD OR MISCREANT?:
Casey Anthony, nuclear power, Anthony Wiener, Ndamakong Suh, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Dave Hester.

THE DAVID CARUSO BAD ACTOR AWARD WINNERS:
Scott Caan, Robert Pattison, Josh Radnor, Russell Brand, Eric Bana, Josh Duhamel, Ashton Kutcher.

THE REBECCA PIDGEON BAD ACTRESS AWARD WINNERS:
Jessica Alba, Megan Fox, Whitney Cummings, Emily Van Camp, Miley Cyrus, Adam Sandler.

DEAD YET?:
Osama bin Laden, Abe Vigoda, Queen Elizabeth II, Charlie Sheen’s career, the Birther movement?

FUNNY PEOPLE:

Eden Sher, Dan Long, Louis C.K., Sofia Vergara, Walmartians.

INTERESTING CAREER PATH CHANGES:
James “Whitey” Bulger – from retiree to federal prisoner; Ted Williams – from homeless addict to golden-throated viral video hero to recovering addict; Herman Cain – from presidential candidate to philanderer; John Edwards – from philandering politician to indicted felon; Joe Paterno – from legendary football coach to disgraced, sickly old man.

“THE WIRE” MEMORIAL GOOD TV AWARD WINNERS:
Homeland, Justified, Modern Family, Person of Interest, Detroit 1-8-7, Southland, anything with Anthony Bourdain.

BAD TV:
Criminal Minds-Suspect Behavior, Pan Am, The Playboy Club, Revenge, Charlie’s Angels, Whitney, Ridiculousness, The Paul Reiser Show, Storage Wars Texas, the Republican Presidential debates.

GONE FROM VERY GOOD TO NOT-SO-GOOD-AT-ALL TV:
Weeds, Entourage, Dexter, Mythbusters, Burn Notice.

THE PARIS HILTON SKANK OF THE YEAR: Lindsay Lohan, who, in honor of her 3rd appearance in this spot, will have the category re-named for her next year. (Sorry, Paris.)
Runners-up: Courtney Love, Paz de la Huerta, Sienna Miller, Lilly Allen.

NOT GAY?:
Taylor Lautner, Lisa Marie Presley, Jeremy Renner, Selma Hayek, Mitt Romney, Richard Jefferson.

CATCHPHRASE OF THE YEAR:
“Winning!”; “hashtag”; “Occupy _____”; “Shit is fucked up and bullshit”; “WWSJD?” (What would Steve Jobs do?).

SIGN THAT THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US:
A $3 million 3-D porno film debuts in Japan to sold-out audiences;
physicists in Switzerland isolate subatomic neutrinos moving faster than the speed of light;
the Justin Bieber paternity suit;
CBS war correspondent Lara Logan is sexually assaulted by a mob in Cairo’s Tahrir Square while reporting on Egypt’s political upheaval;
Hurricane Irene takes lives and destroys property in, of all places, New England;
at various airport screening locations throughout the U.S., the Transportation Security Administration seizes and confiscates a teenage girl’s purse with an embroidered gun on it, a 4-inch plastic rifle from a G.I. Joe action figure (it is a ‘replica weapon’), a liquid-filled baby pacifier taken from a pilot’s infant daughter, a plastic Star Wars light saber toy taken from a toddler and a cupcake (the icing constituted a gel-like substance).

QUOTES OF THE YEAR:
Ron Paul: “Congress is basically filled with demagogues and power-mongers.”;
Warren Buffett: “My friends and I have been coddled long enough by a billionaire-friendly Congress.”;
Rick Perry: “And I will tell ya, it’s three agencies of government when I get there that are gone. Commerce, education and the ahh, what’s the third one there? Let’s see . . . the third agency of government I would do away with – education, uh, the commerce and, let’s see, I can’t. The third one I can’t. Sorry. Oops.”;

Angela Merkel: “If the Euro fails, Europe fails.”; Sarah Palin: “I love the smell of emissions.”;

Mitt Romney: “Corporations are people, my friend.”;

OWS placard: “I’ll believe corporations are people when Texas executes one.”

That's all for now. Coming up next (soon), we will say goodbye to the folks who passed on in 2011.

Coming next week: 2011 in review

2011-12-30T08:35:00.000-06:00

The much-anticipated (?!?) year-end recap is headed your way. Next week. Be watching. Find out what went on this past year, as if you didn't know already.

Ehhhh. It should be worth a chuckle or three.

O, Tannenbaum!?!

2011-12-20T10:02:00.000-06:00

New Board of Directors named for 2012

2011-12-16T07:42:00.000-06:00

A new Board of Directors for Don't Get the Wrong Idea has been put into place. It's not that the old Board was doing a bad job; it was just time for a change. The new board, a bit less cumbersome than the other, can be viewed in the accompanying photo and in the larger, clearer photo at the bottom of the blawg.

Of course, at some point after the new year kicks in, we'll have the usual "Name the Board of Directors" contest with some truly inconsequential prize to hand out to the winner(s). For now, we'll let the board members settle in and find their niche.

Board of Directors, Don't Get the Wrong Idea

Christmas photos, vol. 2

2011-12-15T12:11:00.001-06:00

Christmas photos, vol. 1

2011-12-13T13:27:00.000-06:00

Horrible. Absolutely horrible. Lou Reed & Metallica: The View (Directed by Darren Aronofsky)

2011-12-05T11:04:00.000-06:00

I'm a fan of Lou Reed and, to a lesser degree, of Metallica, as well. But this 'marriage made in heaven' that they've undertaken in the name of Art with a capital A is horrific and unlistenable. Don't blame Metallica; this lies on Lou's shoulders.

Lester Bangs is chuckling from the grave.

The aging process

2011-11-30T12:41:00.001-06:00

Ladies and germs, this is Jeff Beck. This photograph of Jeff Beck proves two things.

One, Jeff is a "Just for Men" hair coloring products customer. The tell-tale shade of brown hair that is only naturally-occuring in bears and some species of spaniels is a dead giveaway. (See Paul McCartney, Tony LaRussa.)

Two, old rock stars never age gracefully.

But the boy can still play.

List of the week: Favorite concerts of all time

2011-11-29T11:04:00.001-06:00

I love music. Music in general, but particularly rock and roll. However, for someone with over 10,000 pieces of vinyl, I have attended relatively few live events. The places I've lived have basically been off the radar of the average traveling band. Any concert worth seeing usually requires a couple hours of drive time and an overnight stay. Thus, I've missed out on a lot of opportunities and there are a lot of bands I've never seen that I really wish I had. (That's a whole 'nother list.)

However, I've seen some great shows and, well, here's my list of all-time favorite live performances that I've attended:

1) Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band - Ritz Theatre, Corpus Christi TX 11/08/74
2) The Rolling Stones / Stevie Wonder - Civic Arena, Pittsburgh PA 07/22/72
3) Elvis Costello & The Attractions / The Rubinoos - Austin Opera House, Austin TX 02/23/79
4) Los Lobos - Gruene Hall, New Braunfels TX 1999
5) Lyle Lovett & His Large Band - Concrete Street Amphitheatre, Corpus Christi TX 2003
6) Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band - The Summit, Houston TX 11/15/80
7) Bob Dylan & The Rolling Thunder Revue - Memorial Coliseum, Corpus Christi TX 05/10/76
8) The Rolling Stones / Los Lonely Boys / Ian McLagan & The Bump Band - Zilker Park, Austin TX 10/22/06

9) John Fogerty - Fortune Bay Casino, Tower MN 06/19/11
10) The Who / Stevie Ray Vaughan / The Fabulous Thunderbirds - Astrodome, Houston TX 09/02/89
11) Jethro Tull / Capt. Beefheart & The Magic Band - WVU Coliseum, Morgantown WV 04/27/72
12) Townes Van Zandt - Mountainlair cafeteria, Morgantown WV 1969
13) Van Morrison / Little Feat - Majestic Theatre, San Antonio TX 11/10/74
14) Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band - Frank Erwin Center, Austin TX 04/17/00
15) Shakira / Wyclef Jean - American Bank Center, Corpus Christi TX 09/20/06
16) Steely Dan - Woodlands Pavilion, Houston TX 09/03/93
17) The Flatlanders - Concrete Street Amphitheatre, Corpus Christi TX 2003
18) John Hiatt / North Mississippi Allstars - Stubb's Bar-B-Q, Austin TX 07/23/05
19) Roky Erickson - ACLFest, Austin TX 09/27/08
20) Shawn Phillips / Leo Kottke - Metropolitan Theatre, Morgantown WV 1972

Honorable mention (in no particular order):

Joe King Carrasco & The Crowns / Little Charlie & The Eager Beaver Boys - Yellow Rose, Corpus Christi TX 1983
Primus / Tool - Sunken Gardens, San Antonio TX 08/18/95
Leon Russell / The Greencards - Gruene Hall, New Braunfels TX 2009
Van Morrison - ACLFest, Austin TX 09/22/06

The Mind Garage - The Olympia, Morgantown WV any Saturday night 1969
The Who / Lynyrd Skynyrd - Convention Center, Dallas TX 11/25/73
Chicago - WVU Coliseum, Morgantown WV 1971
Jerry Jeff Walker - on the beach, North Padre Island TX 2008
Junior Brown - Executive Surf Club, Corpus Christi TX 1995
Chicago / War - Fort Concert, Corpus Christi TX 1983
Santana - Bayfront Auditorium, Corpus Christ TX 1987
The Music Explosion - Community Center, Weirton WV 1968
Curtis Price & The King Sound Interpreters - Pike House basement, Morgantown WV 1971

Album Cover of the Day

2011-11-18T08:02:00.000-06:00

This is from, like, 2008. Looks as though it was culled from a bargain bin in 1970. Retro, dude.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-11-10T10:43:00.000-06:00

I keep looking and looking and looking and . . . I can't find anything remotely appealing about this album cover. Except, of course, for the derrière of the young lady on the left.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-11-07T09:58:00.000-06:00

Liz passed away a short while back. The original Queen of West Coast country, she was not too shabby when it came to songwriting. I always liked this cover and the double-meaning of the album title. Saaaay, what's that in that garter, Liz?

Album Cover of the Day

2011-11-02T10:59:00.002-05:00

Long before there was a much-ballyhooed and over-rated movie starring Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon, 2 of the most unlikely Johnny and June Cash lookalikes you could ever find, there was this forgettable Frankenheimer clunker, the best part of which were the songs and music by the Man in Black. [Yes, I originally posted that River Phoenix starred as Johnny Cash. Who knew he was still dead? My good friend Pavlos, a nouveau grand-pere, graciously pointed out the error of my ways.]

Football conference shuffle continues; WVU headed west

2011-10-26T08:09:00.002-05:00

The National Collegiate Athletic Association -- the NCAA -- is an antiquated institution that either needs a complete overhaul of rules, bylaws and mission statement or needs to be totally disbanded. Plain and simple. The football programs of large universities are pointing that out to us on a weekly basis with all of this Conference Roulette that is going on.

The big players in college football, the SEC, ACC, Big 12, PAC-12 and Big 10 are shifting membership so quickly that you do, indeed, need a scorecard to keep up with the players. And the weak sister of the Bowl Championship Series conferences, the Big East (a/k/a Big Least or Big Easy) is being left in the lurch, shown no respect whatsoever and is destined to either Third World status in college football or total implosion and eradication altogether.

This is why I am more than a bit pleased with the news that my alma mater, West Virginia University, is leaving the Big East to join the Big 12. Not only am I glad that they'll be competing at the highest level now and will be a legitimate recruiting threat in one of the top football states in the nation, Texas, but they'll be playing close to home -- MY home. I'll be able to attend a lot more WVU contests now that I won't have to buy a plane ticket and fly 1600 miles if I want to see a game.

Welcome to my house, Mountaineers.

The Rocket 88s roll to a stop; Johnny Dee, gone at 60

2011-10-24T14:45:00.003-05:00

Keith Landers passed away last week at the age of 60. He died in an ambulance on the way to an Austin hospital following dialysis treatment.

Keith is better known and remembered as Johnny Dee (front and center in the accompanying photo) of Johnny Dee and the Rocket 88s, a wonderful central and south Texas rock and roll show band known as much for their impeccable musicianship and spot-on versions of rock classics as for their humorous approach to rock and roll.

Playing mostly at private affairs, charitable fund-raisers and community expositions throughout Texas, the group built a steady and loyal group of fans and followers over the past 35 years. Far from just a plain oldies band or Sha Na Na clone, the Rocket 88s were a true show band replete with multiple costume changes, choreographed numbers and incredibly accurate versions of popular songs from the 50s and 60s.

In addition, they were featured in one of the single most popular and effective Public Service Announcement ad campaigns ever with their award-winning audio and video performances of the "Don't Mess With Texas" PSA's hailed as the most effective PSA in the history of advertising, helping reduce highway trash in Texas by 60%.

Johnny Dee was a lovable character who will be greatly missed.

There's hope for television in 2011

2011-10-17T15:17:00.000-05:00

Things are starting to look up for The State of Television in 2011. MTV is bringing back Beavis and Butthead.

I can only hope they let them burn stuff again.

Irreverance roooOOOOooolz, man!

(Starting Oct. 27. Be there.)

Album Cover of the Day

2011-10-12T09:40:00.000-05:00

Simple. Stark. Tells a story, even if it is a posed shot. I just like this cover. That's all.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-10-03T11:15:00.000-05:00

From the good old days, a Brigitte Bardot cover. No need for further comment.

Album Cover of the Day -- BIG HAIR

2011-09-25T15:16:00.001-05:00

This album cover has just about everything you'd want from a Country Gospel record -- a bus, an idyllic outdoor setting (complete with duckies), matching outfits on a family singing group (featuring patriotic RED shirts, WHITE ties and BLUE socks on the gentlemen) and . . . big Big BIG HAIR!

I mean . . . daaay-ummm! That's some big hair!

The Breakers - Jerry Lee Symptoms (live in GoMorgen Danmark)

2011-09-24T23:26:00.000-05:00

Album Cover of the Day

2011-09-22T10:07:00.000-05:00

Everybody sing along: "But they're cousins, identical cousins . . . "

Album Cover of the Day & R.I.P.

2011-09-14T10:23:00.000-05:00

Carl Oglesby died yesterday. He was 76.

His name isn't widely known as a Sixties Radical, not in the way of, say, Mario Savio, Huey Newton, Tom Hayden, Jerry Rubin, Eldridge Cleaver, Abbie Hoffman or H. Rap Brown. However, he was arguably the most skilled orator and clearest thinker of the radical movement.

As leader of the SDS (Students for a Democratic Society) in '65-'66, he gave voice to the radical movement in its crucial infancy. His "Let Us Shape the Future" speech, reproduced here, delivered in November of 1965 at a Washington D.C. anti-war rally is far and away the single most memorable and substantial piece of American political rhetoric to come out of the era.

In '68, he was asked by Eldridge Cleaver to run as his vice presidential running mate on the Peace and Freedom Party ticket. Oglesby politely declined.

Long an outspoken opponent of socialism, he was ousted from the SDS in 1969 by members who were tracking in a more radical, Marxist direction. Shortly thereafter, that same year, the SDS imploded and fractured from within, disintegrating and disbanding at its own national convention.

Oglesby went on to record 2 albums of what has been called psychedelic folk music for Vanguard, both of which are extremely scarce yet not highly collectible today. His "Going to Damascus" album is featured here.

Over the years, Oglesby has enjoyed a fruitful career as an academian, author, JFK assassination theorist and was an expert on Carlos Castaneda's works. Oglesby even co-authored a book with TV handyman, Bob Vila.

Adios, Carl.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-09-13T14:45:00.000-05:00

OK, yeah, I get it. The Resurrection of Pigboy Crabshaw. Sure. But it's still an ugly cover. Sorry.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-09-09T08:02:00.000-05:00

Connie Francis must have lived in the recording studio or, at the very least, kept a cot in the back room. Seems like she released an album every 3 or 4 months between 1959 and 1969. Those bastards at MGM surely had an iron-clad contract that demanded PRODUCT, enough so to keep her chained to a recording console for a decade. Canti me, Concetta dolce!

The Curse of RichRod

2011-09-07T08:39:00.000-05:00

This past weekend, Rich Rodriguez's last 2 employers, the University of Michigan and West Virginia University, had their college football home openers delayed and eventually halted in the 3rd and 4th quarters, respectively, due to lightning and horrendous weather?

Coincidence?

I think not.

Unqualified, so to speak

2011-08-31T12:45:00.002-05:00

I got an email from DirecTV requesting that I participate in an online survey about their services, offerings, programming, etc. I've been a DirecTV customer for about 3 years now and really couldn't be happier with their product. Great reception (except during torrential downpours), loads of HD channels, mega-loads of channels, in general. What's not to like?

The request was simple, brief, to the point. No offers of cheap watches or mini-binoculars if I participated, just a nice, polite please and thank you. I figured, "Why not?" For the $$$ that I pay each month, I deserve to be heard. So, I clicked on the link in the email and began the survey.

Question 1.    Age.   I clicked on the corresponding number (couldn't enter the number; had to make a selection from their list). Me, the big Six-Oh.

Question 2.   Gender. Me, male, in case you were wondering.

....... Click on arrow to proceed to page 2.   Done.

Page 2:
Your answers to the previous questions indicate that you do not meet the parameters of our survey.   Thank you for your time and efforts and thank you for being a loyal DirecTV customer.

What?! There it was, the slap in the face.   "YOU'RE TOO FUCKING OLD, DUDE! Maybe next time."

Son of a . . . wow!   Didn't see that coming.   I don't fit the target audience apparently so my opinions don't matter. How 'bout that?!

Well, having stated on numerous occasions that I am a fan and proponent of all things DirecTV, I now feel obliged to add:   Eat me, DirecTV, you pack of ageist money-grubbers! You're on my shit list now.

But thanks for the great HD broadcasts and the NFL Sunday Ticket package. See you soon.

Your fan, ol' Marimba dude.   (Ya bastards!)

[cue Aldo Nova] Life is just a fantasy; can you live this fantasy life?

2011-08-30T12:10:00.000-05:00

Hi, my name's Marimba and I'm a fantasy football addict.

What has become a multimillion dollar industry began decades ago for me when I was welcomed into a local 10 team fantasy league run by a good friend of a good friend. That was back around 1989. Things then were a lot different from the way they are now.

All scoring was gathered and calculated by hand by the dutiful and duly grumpy league commissioner. There were no websites to gather info; it came from the newspapers. There certainly weren't websites that allowed you to set up and manage leagues, especially not with custom scoring systems.

And there were no websites and damned few publications dedicated to fantasy stats and numbers so most of the pre-draft research was culled from whatever sources a person could muster. Nowadays, a person doesn't even have to think about researching information and developing a draft strategy because there are umpteen gazillion websites and services that will do the grunt work for you. All you need to do these days is download and print cheat sheets from any number of sites. If you want to tweak the downloaded lists, that's up to you.

That first league I joined, which is still going strong, is a bit unusual in that it is strictly a "scoring league", meaning you get points if your players score or throw for touchdowns or kick field goals and PATs. The longer the scoring play, the more points accrued, anywhere from 6-20 points per TD, depending. No credit for "performance points", i.e., yards gained, number of receptions or carries, etc. If it goes on the scoreboard, it goes onto your weekly tab. Also, the roster makeup is a bit different from standard fantasy leagues. A starting lineup consists of a QB, 2 RBs, 3 Receivers (wide receivers and tight ends combined; no separate category for tight ends), a Kicker, a Defensive unit and . . . here's what sets this league apart from most others . . . a ROOKIE. The rookie can be a QB, RB, REC or Kicker. Rookie kickers come at a premium; this is about the only time you will (or should) see a kicker drafted as high as the 3rd round. But, that kicker is usually good for an average of 8 points a week and that makes a difference with this league's scoring system.

Over the years, I've joined a few more leagues, some of which have sustained, some of which have disbanded after as little as one season. At current, I am in 4 "real people" leagues and that's just too damned many. But I wouldn't have it any other way. My favorite league is the brainchild of my nephew, Tim. It's a 12-team league for family members only. We held our draft last Saturday night, online, through the NFL.com website. In conjunction with the draft, we had a telephone conference call so family members spread from Texas to West Virginia to Virginia to Rhode Island could visit, chat, kibbitz, talk trash, etc., while the process was going on. This year's draft was a bit chaotic thanks to Hurricane Irene blitzing up the East Coast. Nephew Tim and his son Tom ended up without power/internet reception at their home in Virginia and had to drive to a nearby McDonald's to snag their WiFi signal. They conducted their draft sitting in the Mickey D parking lot, in the rain, truck windows fogged up, on speaker from Tim's cell phone. My niece Ann had troubles, as well. A power surge during the storm's rush northward killed the family's WiFi router so, of 3 league members, only one had access to the internet by bypassing the router and plugging directly into the internet provider, thus two members of the household had to depend on the automated drafter to pick their teams. All in all, not the optimum way to start out, but it's still going to be fun.

So, all I can say at this point in time is . . . if you're a sports fan you've never tried fantasy sports, give it a shot but don't be surprised if you find it a hard habit to kick.

Thanks for listening to my story. There are cookies and coffee on the table in the back. You're welcome to some.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-08-25T09:42:00.000-05:00

A fairly common marketing ploy of the 1950s: package a bunch of killer rhythm 'n' blues tunes by a variety of black artists behind a record sleeve depicting spic 'n' span white kids having a soda pop party. Target audience: white kids with disposable income. The subtle racism of this album cover is nothing compared to the fact that RCA wouldn't even put Charley Pride's face on the cover of his first album because he was . . . you know . . . unwhite.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-08-10T15:02:00.000-05:00

Cheer up, Maddy, it can't be that bad. Or can it??

Album Cover of the Day

2011-08-08T11:38:00.000-05:00

I'm partial to pugs; had one as I was growing up that looked exactly like this one . . . minus the eyewear, naturally.

Most recent additon to my office wall

2011-08-05T12:38:00.001-05:00

I picked up this old (late 50s/early 60s) resonator guitar the other day. I can't play it worth a hoot but I like the way it looks, so . . . I hung it on the wall in my office at work.

I think it fits in well next to the Bugs Bunny cel art.

It's not as cool as my original Grego Anderson 'Robert Johnson' guitar hanging elsewhere in the office but I like it just the same. (That's Kinky Friedman on the left of RJ and Joe Ely/Esther's Follies/Uranium Savages -- New Year's Eve, 1982 -- on the right.)

. . . Please excuse the photo quality -- they're cell phone captures.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-08-03T10:11:00.000-05:00

There's something about this one . . . I dunno . . . is it the headphones? The concept of rappers wearing tuxedos? The burning desire of a young African-American to be a ventriloquist? I dunno . . . I just can't put my finger on it.

Another hero, gone to Jesus. Alex Steinweiss is dead.

2011-07-20T08:37:00.001-05:00

Another of my personal heros, Alex Steinweiss, has passed away at the age of 94.

Steinweiss was the inventor of the record album cover and even the most casual of followers of this blawg know how much I love album cover art.

Yes, something that we pretty much take for granted as always being around was, in fact, invented, for lack of a better word, in 1939 at the request of Columbia Records executives looking to find a better way to market their product other than in the plain brown, green or blue cardboard covers used at the time. A member of the Columbia advertising department, Steinweiss developed the first graphic artwork for an album (at the time, a multiple record package housed in book-like packaging similar to a photo album, thus the name) when he came up with a stark and stylish theatre marquee design for a collection of symphonic performances of Rogers & Hart songs (above right). Sales sky-rocketed. A Bruno Walter symphonic recording was re-released with Steinweiss cover artwork and sales increased by nearly 10 times its previous total.

From that point on, nearly 100% of Columbia albums carried graphic artwork, of which nearly 90%, early on, was created by Steinweiss. Other record companies quickly followed suit.

Alex Steinweiss was known for his fanciful and highly stylized cover graphics -- geometric shapes of solid colors, keyboards and musical instruments floating in space, street lamps illuminating scenery and, later in his career, a distinctive swirled style of lettering that became a font style of its own known as the Steinweiss Scrawl. As quickly as other record companies grabbed onto Columbia's coattails with their album cover art, other graphic artists, either of their own volition or at the behest of their employers, were adopting or copying Alex Steinweiss's style, most notably perhaps being Frank Decker for RCA Victor.

Steinweiss remained active in the Columbia art department for years and when the company planned to make its switch from the old 78rpm format to its new and, as yet, unannounced Long Playing 33-1/3rpm format, they looked to him to help design an entirely new type of packaging for this single, larger disc that would take the place of the old album configuration. So it came to pass that Steinweiss and his brother-in-law would come to hold the original patent for what was to become the music industry standard packaging -- the folded-and-glued, 12-3/8"x12-3/8" cardboard album cover as we know it today.

Steinweiss ended his association with the music business in the early '70s, realizing that his own style of art was far out of touch with the newer psychedelic and pop-art designs prominent in the rock world. Moving his family to Florida, he concentrated on his own personal art, dealing heavily in ceramics and later in oil paintings. He and his wife Blanche spent 71 years together; she passed away last year.

Click on the above photo for slide show

Interspersed throughout this piece are photos of several notable Steinweiss covers and some of my personal favorites. The Paul Robeson "Songs of Free Men" cover is displayed prominently in my office at work. Click on the Moody Woody cover at the right to view a mini-slide show of Steinweiss covers.

A fine man, Alex Steinweiss. His work and legacy live forever.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-07-19T11:13:00.000-05:00

No real need to comment on this one. The photo says it all.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-07-18T12:45:00.000-05:00

A classic Jim Flora cover. Great music, too.

Adding insult to . . .

2011-07-13T09:45:00.003-05:00

Rob Grill passed away. He was the lead singer for The Grass Roots. I had the good fortune to meet him in the late 80s or early 90s when he was on tour as part of the Happy Together rocknroll oldies show. Seemed like a fine fellow.

I note his passing here not so much as a remembrance but more to point out that, even after death, we are not immune to insults, intentional or otherwise.

On the New York Times website this morning, Grill's obituary has an accompanying photo (below) of the Grass Roots in which he is misidentified. The NYTimes indicates that Grill is the man standing on the far right but that, in fact, is Rick Coonce. Grill is 2nd from the right and is identified as Warren Entner. On the main obituary e-page, the NYTimes uses a cropped head shot of Coonce from this photo and indicates that it is Rob Grill.

I dropped an email earlier today to the writer of the obituary, Margalit Fox (to whom I'd given props in this blawg just last week for some clever writing in another of her obits), mentioning this screw-up, knowing that this switcheroo error was probably not of her doing but I didn't know who else to write to. As of the time I post this entry, no change has been made on the NYTimes website.

[As a follow-up, a correction has been made on the Times website and Rob Grill is properly identified. As a matter of full disclosure, this blawg entry and my email to Ms. Fox originally (and incorrectly) pointed out that the fellow originally listed as Rob Grill was Warren Entner. Not so. I was wrong. It happens. A lot.]
R.I.P., Mr. Grill.

The Grass Roots, from left: Dennis Provisor, Rick Coonce, Warren Entner and Rob Grill. No, wait, that's not right. Provisor, Entner, Grill & Coonce. Yeah. That's it. Come on, New York Times! Get your shit together.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-07-12T12:43:00.001-05:00

This is a fairly well-known album and cover but I've got to agree with Steely Dan's own Donald Fagen who says this is the most hideous album cover of the 70s, bar none. (Which ain't necessarily a bad thing, y'know?!)

The Top Ten Rock and Roll Villains (yes, another freaking list!)

2011-07-08T11:33:00.003-05:00

This is undoubtedly my poorest-written blawg entry but I just felt I had to rush it onto the e-page. For that, I apologize upfront.

It can be argued that rock and roll is dead. Certainly, there are still “rock bands” out there making a living recording and performing “rock music” but rock and roll as it was in the 50s and 60s is a thing of the past.

Over the years there have been numerous entities -- people, institutions, products, phenomena -- that have either been accused of or have admitted to trying to kill off the genre of rock and roll. These, as I call them, are the true villains of rock and roll.

So it is with little fanfare and minimal introduction that I give you my Top Ten Villains of Rock and Roll, listed in copyrighted David Letterman reverse numerical order (along with some deserving dishonorable mentions):

---------------------------

10) Small airplanes: These little single- or twin-engined coffins have taken the lives of many a great musical performer: Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, The Big Bopper, Otis Redding, Patsy Cline, Rick Nelson, Ronnie Van Zant, Steve Gaines, Jim Croce, Randy Rhoads, John Denver and on and on. If you count helicopters, we’ve got Stevie Ray Vaughan and Bill Graham to add to the list, as well. Stick to the highways, folks, or fly bigger jets. Disasters.

9) Herman Lubinsky, Syd Nathan, Morris Levy and countless other record label owners: Notorious cheapskates (Nathan) and thieves (Lubinsky) and worse (Levy), these men built small financial empires at the expense of the artists they employed. Granted, without these men, we’d not have some of the great RnR, RnB, blues, gospel, country recordings they were responsible for but, come on, fellas . . . you could have at least paid a decent wage while skimming royalties and denying songwriter credits. If you want an eye opener into this underworld, read Tommy James’s autobiography, “Me, the Mob and the Music,” and you’ll understand why Morris Levy is on this list. Crooks.

8) Murry Wilson, Joe Jackson: These 2 men may just be the worst fathers in the history of music. Wilson was the domineering, venal father of Brian, Carl and Dennis Wilson of the Beach Boys, the original manager of that band and an all-around asshole, by all accounts. His abusiveness (and the swing of a 2x4) led to Brian’s hearing loss in one ear and the irreparable emotional scars that Brian carries to this day. When the Beach Boys eventually tired of their father’s manipulative shenanigans and fired him he simply found a new group of southern Californians and tried to make a go of it molding The Sunrays into Beach Boys clones or Capitol Records. That didn’t work out too well. Undaunted, he finagled Capitol into releasing the Many Moods of Murry Wilson album in 1967. That didn’t work out too well, either. Joe Jackson, on the other hand, pretty much followed the same path with his sons, The Jackson 5 and, in the process, denied the boys, especially Michael, a childhood. We all know how that ended. Jerks.

7) Ed Sullivan: I know, I know, you’re thinking ‘Wait a minute! The Ed Sullivan Show was a helluva venue for rock and r’n’b and soul acts.’ Yeah, OK, you’re right. But don’t forget, Sullivan had no love for the music and is the man who insisted on filming Elvis Presley from the waist up so as not to poison youthful viewers with The King’s gyrating hips and legs. Also, he’s the same guy who insisted on changes to so-called offensive lyrics, famously changing The Rolling Stones’s “Let’s Spend the Night Together” to “Let’s Spend Some Time Together”, which Jagger & Co. pussied out and obliged. He also tried to change the “couldn’t get much higher” line in The Doors’s “Light My Fire”, a change that was agreed upon before the show but, instead, Jim Morrison sang the lyrics intact on the show, pissing off Sullivan to no end. So, to hell with Ed and his rillllly big shooooo and all of his demands and blacklisting. Douchebag.

6) Mark David Chapman: This delusional bastard killed John Lennon. What else needs to be said? Asshole.

5) MTV: The television network that shifted a song’s importance away from its music and lyrics to its video representation, a very nasty thing to do. Corrupted an entire generation or two and managed to convince almost all musical acts that if they were to have any sense of self-worth and fulfillment, they needed to be successful in the world of music videos. Pitiful.

4) The Grammy Awards: The National Academy of Recording Arts and Science has never, ever understood rock and roll and probably wishes it had never existed. The Grammys excluded the likes of Elvis Presley (for anything other than its Gospel music category), Led Zeppelin, Chuck Berry, the aforementioned Beach Boys, Bob Marley, The Supremes, The Who, The Doors, Buddy Holly, Neil Young, etc. In both 1966 and 1967, the Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Group performance went not to The Beatles or Supremes or Beach Boys or The Mamas and Papas but to the Anita Kerr Singers. And, of course, there’s that thing about the winner of the first ever Grammy for Heavy Metal – Jethro Tull!?!?! Pathetic.

3) Compact Discs: Sure, they’re convenient as hell, easy to handle, simple to navigate and they don’t take up anywhere near the shelf space of vinyl records but compact discs . . . how shall I put this? . . . they suck. I don’t care what you say -- they have none of the warmth, depth of sound or intimacy of a vinyl record; they’re cold. (If you want warmth and intimacy, play an old acoustically-recorded 78rpm record. Amazing sound.) The ease at navigating around and through a CD via skipping songs at the push of a button pretty much killed the album concept altogether. Too many people give only a perfunctory listen to a song, maybe the first 30-40 seconds before deciding that they don’t like a particular song and never, ever listen to it again, never allow the song to possibly grow on you. And the size of the packaging has killed off album cover art, not to mention song titles altogether. “Hey, did you hear Track 3 on the new Radiohead CD? Cool.” Track 3? What’s the fricking title? Does anyone read the info on CDs any more? It’s awfully small print, I know. The hell with the 'Back to Mono' Movement; I say, Back to Vinyl!

2) Disco: OK, so I like Saturday Night Fever and I really have a soft spot for SNF-period BeeGees but this bastard step-child of Isaac Hayes, Kenny Gamble and Leon Huff just about killed ALL of music in the mid-to-late 70s. The soupy string sections, slick and uninspired bass runs, four-on-the-floor rhythms (sad to say but 2 of my musical heros, Al Kooper and Skunk Baxter, teamed up for a discofied album in 1979 under the name of 4 on the Floor), the chirpy horn sections all added up to some of the most derivative, unoriginal and uninspired music ever made. And don’t get me started on the polyester double-knit fashion styles that Disco gave us. Bad, bad music. Having said that, I’ll add . . . “Long live Sir Monti Rock III.”

1) Col. Tom Parker: This fat bastard and his carny mind-set took the greatest singer and the biggest rock and roll star of all time, a pure country boy with rhythm and soul coursing through his veins, and turned him into white bread. Parker took him to Hollywood to appear in a seemingly never-ending stream of inane and fatuous films and cast aside the songwriting talents of Leiber & Stoller, Pomus & Shuman and Otis Blackwell in favor of the Aberbach brothers’ Hill & Range Publishing Company stooges. While the music world was changing in 1967 with the release of some of the most meaningful albums ever, like Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, Are You Experienced?, Fresh Cream and The Velvet Underground & Nico, the fat colonel had Elvis immersed in the cookie-cutter process of churning out 3 films per year. ‘67 saw the release of Easy Come, Easy Go, Double Trouble and Clambake (which did NOT feature that horrible song, “Do The Clam” which was from his ’65 clunker, Girl Happy). It’s impossible to say what may have become of Elvis had he never encountered Andreas Cornelis van Kuijk, an illegal immigrant who joined the US Army (from which he later went AWOL) under the fake name of Thomas Parker, allegedly one step ahead of a murder arrest in his native Netherlands. One can only imagine how much better the King could have been. Shame.

Also worthy of your scorn and opprobrium are: Clear Channel, Altamont, heroin, Ticketron/Ticketmaster, drum machines, 2/3/59, The Monkees, festival seating, Ike Turner, Supergroups, Mitch Miller, Glam Rock, power ballads, The Eagles, Limp Bizkit/Woodstock III, Pat Boone, Tipper Gore, Milli Vanilli, Sid Vicious, Wham!, rap and Len Barry (it’s personal).

Feel free to comment with your own villains or to disagree with mine.

A welcome bit of sarcasm . . . from an unusual source

2011-07-06T07:41:00.001-05:00

In her fond and informative New York Times obituary of Cleveland Plain Dealer rock and roll critic Jane Scott who passed away the other day at the age of 92, Margalit Fox drops a parenthetical comment that is indeed the finest little bit of sarcasm I've seen lately in what one could call "legitimate journalism."

Fox recounts the story of Scott, long known as the world's oldest rock critic and second-oldest (only to Dick Clark) American teenager, buying her first record:

The first record she bought was Jimmy Rushing singing “Sent for You Yesterday,” which she played on her hand-cranked Victrola. (A Victrola is something like an iPod, only larger.)

What a great line!

Thanks, Margalit. And thanks to you, too, Jane for a fine career.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-06-27T12:11:00.001-05:00

Lots of things to catch up on after a triumvirate (triplicate?) (triad?) of travels but, for now, just another ACotD:

When you get right down to it, this is a pretty dumb cover. No two ways about it.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-06-14T11:00:00.000-05:00

Finishing up our titillation theme today before the much-better-half and I take off to the Great White North for a little RnR in Minn/St Paul and then Lake Vermilion. Here's Jayne. She was a tease. She knew exaclty what she was doing.

See you in a week or so..............................

Album Cover of the Day

2011-06-13T12:04:00.000-05:00

OK, OK, so I got a little side-tracked last week and didn't finish what I started. I blame the NBA finals. And early summer malaise. And the Taliban.

Here's another offering for titillation week . . . a supposed "Beatles Tribute" record that is comprised entirely of songs from the catalogs of solo work of former Beatles members. About the only thing that could sell this album is the sweet young lady on the cover. And her left nipple.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-06-07T07:33:00.000-05:00

Continuing now with Round Two of titillation week in the ACotD review: No genitalia, no nipples = No More Love. A simple, logical formula, really.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-06-06T10:02:00.000-05:00

It's sexual titillation week in the Wrong Idea Album Cover Hall of Fame. We're gonna start with a little Percy Mayfield. And then some.

Umbrella drinks

2011-05-27T11:36:00.002-05:00

Lucky weekend

2011-05-16T11:42:00.001-05:00

It was a good weekend for the Marimba family. A lucky weekend, for certain.

On Friday, I got a phone call from a semi-ecstatic Young Son Marimba who told me he had just won a contest sponsored by State Bicycle Company for naming their newest style of bicycle. The bicycle he named is pictured here and is called, thanks to him, The Blue Print.

For his efforts, he has been shipped the very first Blue Print cycle to leave the State Bike factory. I have to admit, that's pretty cool.

They're good bikes. It's a good company, too -- good, honest people. Check 'em out at their website, here.

Then, the next morning, I attended the Texas State Bonsai Convention here in town - bonsai being one of my two Japanese-rooted obsessions/interests, the other being Samurai films (see earlier post from 4/28/11). They held a raffle and after purchasing $40 worth of raffle tickets, I ended up winning 2 fantastic bonsai plants that would have sold for over $500 total. One of the plants is shown below (please excuse the lousy focus; taken on my cellphone cam.)

Yeeee, as they say, haw! I am a happy camper.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-05-12T07:43:00.000-05:00

Oh, my. Is this an album about . . . naaaaaah, can't be!

Album Cover of the Day

2011-05-10T08:31:00.000-05:00

Mr. Show Biz.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-05-04T07:45:00.000-05:00

From the zenith of the Nudie's Spangled Suit Era in Country Music.

Samurai favorites (another goddamned list)

2011-04-28T13:50:00.001-05:00

I am giving some serious thought to driving to Austin this weekend to be one of the first in the USA to view Takashi Miike’s new film “13 Assassins.” Austin is one of only 3 cities showing the film this week – the others being, naturally, Los Angeles and New York.

You see, I am a big, big fan of Japanese Samurai films.

While I, in no way, consider myself an expert on the genre, I am a true fan and will readily go out of my way to watch a good chanbara flick. In the days before VCRs and DVRs, I was known to set my alarm for 3:00am to rise to watch a Zatoichi movie on some obscure cable channel. I’ve rented a hotel room solely to watch “Chushingura” because the hotel's commercial-only satellite feed carried a channel my residential system didn’t provide. A leisurely drive to a wonderful city like Austin just to catch a movie pales in comparison.

Zatoichi. Perhaps my favorite of any type of movie 'franchises' is that of Zatoichi, the Blind Swordsman, a/k/a Zatoichi the Blind Masseur. There have been 20-some Zatoichi films made, dating back to the early 60s. The movies tell the tale of the blind masseur/acupuncturist/musician/gambler who travels the countryside of Edo-period Japan and, when provoked and with reason, will rely on his magnificent swordsman skills and acute sense of hearing to battle the forces of evil. Such a concept! Magical. Laughable. Powerful.

The Zatoichi series spawned a TV series in Japan in the 70s. There was even a brief series of movies about a blind female Samurai, The Crimson Bat. And, of course, westerners gave a go at the concept, most notably "Blind Fury" with Rutger Hauer as a blind, sword-wielding Vietnam vet.

I could go on and on about The Big Z, but I will not.

Instead, I’ll turn my attention to a list or, as most who know me would say, another goddamned list . . . as in, “Dude, not another goddamned list?!?!!?!”

Yep, another list. My favorite Samurai films of all time. (Why do we, as a whole, tend to throw in the phrase “of all time” in such matters? Shouldn’t “My favorite Samurai films” suffice? But, I digress.) I have listed the flicks below showing the year of release and the name of the director for I feel that Samurai films reflect the vision and efforts of the director much more so than the contributions of the actors or the writers.

So, in copyrighted David Letterman reverse order, I give you my Top Fifteen faves. No Zatoichi films are included as they, in my mind, are of their own ilk. I also have left out my favorite American-made Samurai film, “Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai,” simply because of its country of origin. (Kindly disregard the fact that No. 10 on my list was filmed in Canada.)

To the list . . .

15) Samurai Rebellion (1967), director: Mabaki Kobayashi. A well-paced study of individual uprising in the late feudal period. A fine performance from the master of Samurai acting, Toshiro Mifune.

14) The Twilight Samurai (2002), d. Yoji Yamada. Love, honor and civil unrest in the fading years of feudal Japan.

13) The Hidden Fortress (1958), d. Akira Kurosawa. An early effort from the Kurosawa, the genius of Samurai films. This is famously noted as an inspiration to George Lucas for “Star Wars” although not necessarily for the main plotline of the 2 peasants unknowingly helping a general and a princess across enemy lines as for the depiction of the 2 bumbling peasants as C3PO and R2D2 in the sci-fi classic.

12) Harakiri (1962), d. Kurosawa. A meditation on forced suicide as part of the Samurai Code.

11) Throne of Blood (1957), d. Kurosawa. One of two Kurosawa films loosely based on a Shakespearean play, this one being “Macbeth.”

10) Heaven and Earth (1991), d. Haruki Kadokawa. Visually breathtaking, long on action, short on story development, probably not found on many such lists but the battle scenes of the red and the black forces against each other are amazing.

9) Kagemusha (1980), d. Kurosawa. Think “Moon Over Parador” meets “Dave” on the battlefields of 16th century Japan, without the laughs. I know. That’s a hard one to get your head around but it’s fairly accurate.

8) Samurai II – Duel at Ichijoji Temple (1955), d. Hiroshi Inagaki. Second in the trilogy about the legendary fighter, Musashi Miyamoto, starring the ubiquitous Toshiro Mifune.

7) The 47 Ronin (1941), d. Kenji Mizogushi. Released the week preceding the Pearl Harbor attack, largely overlooked, unavailable in the USA until the 70s (80s?), this is a visitation to an old Japanese legend, well-executed but a bit slow for some. This should probably share the #7 spot with the Kon Ichikawa visual masterpiece of the same name from 1994. However, the fact that Keanu Reeves is currently filming a version of “47 Ronin” has me scared half to death.

6) The Sword of Doom (1966), d. Kihachi Okamoto. Can a protagonist be evil? I’m so confused.

5) Chushingura (1962), d. Hiroshi Inagaki. Another version of the fable of the 47 Ronin, this is the best of the lot, by far. Perceived drawback: 204 minutes long, although originally release in the USA at only 108 minutes. It’s worth every second of viewing, though.

4) Rashomon (1950), d. Kurosawa. Although far from his first effort, this is the one that introduced Kurosawa to the world outside Japan and established him at the top of the genre. It’s low budget Kurosawa, for certain, but the telling of a single tale of a murder from 4 perspectives is deftly handled.

3) The Seven Samurai (1954), d. Kurosawa. The one Samurai film that almost every movie fan is remotely familiar with, if only as the source for “The Magnificent Seven,” this is a true classic. Mifune again stars as the samurai who fields a team of 7 out-of-work swordsmen to defend a village from a gang of thugs, all for the price of 3 meals a day.

2) Yojimbo (1955), d. Kurosawa. Upon entering a town divided by 2 warring, rival gangs, our hero, Mifune (again, yes, Mifune) plays the 2 sides against each other in clever, humorous and deadly fashion. Mifune invents the character of the nameless warrior later used so effectively by Clint Eastwood as the man with no name in the Leone spaghetti westerns. I could watch this once a week and never get tired of it.

1) Ran (1985), d. Kurosawa. A visual stunner, hard to believe that Kurosawa’s eyesight (again, yes, Kurosawa) had deteriorated immensely by the time this was made. The second “Shakespearian” storyline for the director, this one based upon “King Lear”, this film has some of the greatest battle scenes ever filmed and I don’t mean just Samurai battle scenes. Brilliant color. Why don’t we whip up a batch of popcorn and throw this one in the DVD player right now?

Now, will someone please tell me how I can find a copy of some of the silent film work of Masahiro Makino or Daisuke Ito? I'm dying to see what Samurai films looked like in the 20s.

But . . . isn't that the point??!!??

2011-04-26T11:10:00.000-05:00

Album Cover of the Day

2011-04-20T10:43:00.000-05:00

There's really no need to add a comment on this cover; it speaks for itself. Perfection.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-04-18T11:30:00.001-05:00

Steverino tickles the ivories for the Mad Men crowd. Are you influential? Is this music for you? If not, you get Lo-Fi!

Bill Pitcock IV, RIP

2011-04-14T09:45:00.000-05:00

Bill Pitcock IV passed away the other day. Although not a name that most folks are familiar with (and what a great name it is!), Pitcock is a 30 year veteran of the Tulsa music scene and famously played with the Dwight Twilley Band in the many incarnations of the Dwight Twilley/Oister/Phil Seymour triumvirate.

An excellent guitarist, Pitcock never achieved the success and fame that someone of his skills deserved. For his work on the DTB album "Sincerely" alone, he has earned the respect of great guitarists everywhere. DTB recorded some excellent power pop in the same vein as The Raspberries, The Flamin' Groovies, Big Star, The Shoes and early Todd Rundgren right on down through to Marshall Crenshaw and The Smithereens.

Somewhere out there in YouTubeLand, is a video of The Dwight Twilley Band performing one of their early numbers with Dwight on keyboards, Phil Seymour on drums, Bill Pitcock on guitar and a pre-Heartbreakers Tom Petty on bass. It's a hoot. I'll insert it here later if I can find it.

While it's sad for me to hear that Bill is gone, there's some solace in knowing that he leaves behind a son named, yes, you guessed it, Bill Pitcock V. Great name, ain't it?

Album Cover of the Day

2011-04-12T08:02:00.000-05:00

Truth in advertising.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-04-07T11:50:00.000-05:00

So wrong, so very, very wrong on so many levels.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-04-05T07:50:00.000-05:00

So you're hosting a party and it's getting late, very late, to the point of being very early the next day, even. And people just keep hanging on, getting more wasted and incoherent and sloppy and, oops, there goes a rum and coke into the sofa! What to do, what to do? I know! Put on this 30 minute extravaganza of screaming, wailing, bawling babies and watch how fast the place clears out. A real problem solver, this album is.

Has this ever happened to you?

2011-04-04T09:27:00.000-05:00

So, we had spent the weekend, the much-better-half and I, walking the streets of Fredericksburg, TX, hiking around a bit in the hills south of town, wandering around the wonderful place that is Luckenbach, Texas and had a great time.

On Sunday morning, we awoke in our rented cabin, fixed breakfast, packed our bags and were preparing to head back to that which we call civilization.

Our cabin was at the end of a short rip-rap trail down a hillside, meaning an up-hill walk to the car. I had our baggage in hand and took a step up the pathway with my left foot.  So far, so good. Then I lifted my right foot, stepped up and planted my heel on the rockpath.  Immediately, two little gnomes ran from the woods, one on each side of me, and plunged long, sharp, heated daggers into the sides of my right knee.

Or, at least, that's what it felt like.

I stopped.   Stood there. Motionless.   Thinking. What the hell was that?!?!

I hadn't twisted the knee. I knew that much. Must have been a fluke. No biggie. So I stepped up again with my left foot and then the right foot and then . . . here came those freaking little knife-wielding gnomes again! Jeeeezussss!

What in the name of ACL was going on here? Was my old enemy, chondromalacia, flaring up again? Don't think so; chondro never felt like this.

I hobbled the rest of the way up the path to the car, dragging my leg like Chester Goode (Google it, kiddies.). I told my wife, who'd been waiting at the car, "You're not gonna believe this."   She did. She knows me too well. If something ridiculously outrageous is going to happen, it's going to happen to me.

So . . . in the aftermath (this all occurred several weeks ago), I've been trying to avoid the obvious (a trip to the orthopedist) and have been popping Aleve, wearing a knee brace and trying to maintain a steady gate. No more breakdancing for me. I'll survive this medical fiasco and I will NOT go under the knife. Don't need that.

In the meantime, if you see some old fart limping down the street, take pity. That's not me but it could be you in a few years.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-03-30T07:35:00.000-05:00

Another fine, artful, straight-forward cover from David Stone Martin.

Super Glue inventor passes, freed from his binds

2011-03-28T09:20:00.001-05:00

Harry W. Coover, Jr., the man who invented Super Glue, passed away this past weekend at the age of 94.

Mr. Coover died in his home in Kingsport, Tennessee Saturday night due to congestive heart failure according to his daughter, Dr. Melinda Coover Paul.

Coover had been confined to his home, unable to leave, for the past 6 months due to an unfortunate mix-up attributed to the onset of dementia. According to his daughter, in an attempt to remedy a few squeaky doors at his home, Mr. Coover had mistakenly applied his own invention to the hinges instead of using WD-40.

Investigators indicated that this ironic mishap had nothing to do with Mr. Coover's demise.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-03-24T10:44:00.000-05:00

Slim Goodbody always scared me. And I also had trouble with the Kraft Foods tie-in to good health. I'm OK with the Capt. Kangaroo endorsement, though.

Ferlin Husky is Gone

2011-03-18T16:41:00.000-05:00

Ferlin Husky has passed away. Age 85. He had just been released into hospice care from a Hendersonville, TN hospital 2 days prior.

Husky was a singer with a heckuva voice, best known, perhaps, for his first successful solo hit, "Gone", and 1960's "Wings of a Dove", a finger-popping, hand-clapping gospel tune that spent 10 or so weeks at #1 on the Country charts, one of only 4 songs to achieve number one status that year, an amazing fact. (The others: Jim Reeves/"He'll Have to Go"; Hank Locklin/"Please Help Me, I'm Falling" and Cowboy Copas/"Alabam".)

After several unsuccessful recordings under the name Terry Preston, chosen for him because industry know-it-alls considered his given name to be too quirky and unbelievable, Ferlin signed with Capitol Records and re-recorded and re-released "Gone" under his own name and started a long and prosperous singing career that eventually led to the Country and Western Hall of Fame.

Husky's smooth voice, handsome looks and wavy hair afforded him a good deal of crossover recognition from the pop, rock'n'roll and Hollywood communities in the 50s as he appeared in several films, including "Mister Rock and Roll" with Alan Freed, Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Clyde McPhatter, Frankie Lymon, LaVern Baker and Teddy Randazzo. He was also in "Country Music Holiday" alongside Faron Young, June Carter (Cash), The Jordanaires and Lonzo & Oscar.

To all of his accomplishments, add one of the coolest album covers of all time (ABOVE).

See ya, Ferlin. You will be missed.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-03-18T08:20:00.000-05:00

No, no, no! When I said I wanted a hoops cover for the blawg, I meant basketball. It's March Madness, people!

Big Green Thing terrorizes Japan's northeastern coastline

2011-03-15T15:28:00.001-05:00

Things get scary when life imitates art. (Where's Raymond Burr when we need him?)

Album Cover of the Day: What's fallout, Mommy?

2011-03-15T07:28:00.000-05:00

Should we be preparing for nuclear rain? How safe do you feel now about that Nuke Plant just down the road? Is it 1961 all over again?

(Just think. Your parents and/or grandparents used to sit around the old console hi-fi and listen to records like the one above, working themselves into an anti-commie lather, mispronouncing the word 'nuclear' and making sure they had plenty of batteries for the 7-transistor radio that was constantly tuned to the CONELRAD stations. My uncle built a fallout shelter in his basement. It was a different world then, for sure.)

Album Cover of the Day

2011-03-11T08:08:00.000-06:00

One of the earliest parodies of The Beatles' 'Abbey Road' cover was this downhome soul version from Booker T & The MGs for their LP 'McLemore Avenue', the home of Stax Records, visible in the background at left, the building with the theatre marquee. I have been to the Stax studio, now a museum and popular tourist attraction in Memphis, but I didn't have the forethought to have myself photographed crossing the street at this same juncture. A missed opportunity.

Stumbled upon: The heart of darkness

2011-03-09T07:27:00.001-06:00

I literally stumbled upon this photo at the StumbleUpon website, a great little place to kill some time.

The snapshot conjures up all sorts of possible scenarios, storylines, outcomes . . . tooling down the highway, late at night, jammed 3-wide into a sweet little 2-seater that costs more than the average Wisconsin state employee makes in a year, we find Hunter S. Thompson, John Cusack and Johnny Depp, cigarettes in place, escorting a blow-up doll around town. What a night that must have been.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-03-02T07:26:00.000-06:00

Something very heiroglyphic about this cover. Dig those crazy song titles: Divorce Me C.O.D., Shot Gun Boogie, Beauty Parade Gossip. This one is from the days when jazz big bands were still trying to figure this new-fangled rock and roll thing out.

Album Cover Girl of the Day . . . Gone

2011-03-01T08:13:00.000-06:00

Suze Rotolo, Bob Dylan's main squeeze and inspiration in his earliest days in New York, has passed away at the age of 67. Lung cancer.

Famous for appearing with Dylan on the cover of his "Freewheelin' " album (above), Rotolo was the daughter of Italian Communists and was instrumental in helping Dylan forge his views on current affairs and social upheaval. Dylan was quoted as saying, "I stayed up and wrote songs and showed them to her and asked her: ‘Is this right’? because her father and her mother were associated with unions and she was into this equality-freedom thing long before I was."

She lived her life as an artist and, in 2008, published "A Freewheelin' Time: A Memoir of Greenwich Village in the Sixties." Speaking of her iconic album cover appearance, Rotolo had said, "It was freezing out. He [Dylan] wore a very thin jacket, because image was all. Our apartment was always cold, so I had a sweater on, plus I borrowed one of his big, bulky sweaters. On top of that I put on a coat. So I felt like an Italian sausage. Every time I look at that picture, I think I look fat."

The memory lives on.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-02-28T09:56:00.000-06:00

Happy and grinning. Gay and proud.

Album Cover of the Day

2011-02-26T14:42:00.000-06:00

I just want to know how the guy with the Heath Ledger lipstick got that piano out into the woods. And why? And why aren't these women freaked out? I would be.

A worthy cause

2011-02-25T08:41:00.001-06:00

A good while back, I read an article SOTI (somewhere on the internet) about a gentleman who was pursuing a noble cause -- providing headstones for the unmarked graves of former Negro League baseball players. The man, Dr. Jeremy Krock, has done wonderful work, establishing the Negro Leagues Baseball Grave Marker Project. ESPN recently featured the project on their "Outside the Lines" show (see below).

I was so taken by this fellow's efforts that I did something that I, sad to admit, rarely do. I sent him a donation. It was a small donation, a hundred clams. But I so infrequently find a cause that I can get behind with 100% commitment, a cause whose politics, or lack thereof, totally appeals to me.

I encourage all of you to seek out more information about this gentleman and his organization (Google him/it) and dig deep into your pocket and send off a small monetary contribution, if you will. To further induce you to cough up the dough, for every donation that is received by this cause that mentions the Don't Get the Wrong Idea blawgspot, I promise to pitch in some additional cash. I'll pop for a minimum of a measly ten bucks for every donation but the larger the amount you send, the larger the amount I add to your endowment. So . . . go big and make me crawl off my wallet. And, yes, it is tax deductible.

Read about the project; take part in it; feel good about yourself.

MORE INFO (from Dr. Krock):

A segment on the Negro Leagues Baseball Grave Marker Project will run during "Outside the Lines" on Sunday, February 20th at 9:00 AM ET on ESPN, then 10:00AM ET on ESPN2. (8:00 and 9:00 Central time). We spent three days in November with Greg Garber and Tina Cerbone of ESPN. They spent a great deal of time in Chicago and especially Burr Oak Cemetery, filming the markers that we have placed there. ESPN also visited a marker supplier in Dayton as they manufactured the marker for Hall of Famer, Frank Grant, who is buried in an unmarked grave in Clifton, New Jersey. In addition, they interviewed former Commissioner of Baseball, Fay Vincent who has been a great supporter of our project. We appreciate this national exposure of the NLBGMP and the Negro Leagues Committee of SABR, during this Black History Month.

I give my thanks to all of you that have supported us these past seven years. We have the funds raised to place markers in 2011 on the unmarked graves of Grant, and Carroll Ray "Dink" Mothell of Topeka, Kansas. We are also starting to raise funds to place a marker on the unmarked grave of Baseball Hall of Famer, King Solomon "Sol" White on Staten Island, with plans to complete that in 2011 as well.

If there are any questions about these upcoming events, please don't hesitate to contact me. Again, my thanks.

Negro Leagues Baseball Grave Marker Project

Jeremy Krock

jlkrock@comcast.net

733 West Brookforest Drive

Peoria, IL

61615-1069

http://www.nlbgmp.com/

Album Cover of the Day

2011-02-24T09:01:00.002-06:00

OK, is the family name Simmon or Simmons? Are these the Simmons or the Simmonses? And am I the only one who cares?

Such a great album cover, though. The outfits, the hairstyles, the eyewear. Ladies, those dresses . . . I gotta tell ya, you look like you fell into Lady Bird Johnson's flower garden and came out smiling. (Coulda used a brighter background, though, folks.)

This feature will no longer be posted at the bottom of the blogpage. The Album Cover of the Day will become a featured, daily post appearing prominently at the top center of the page. Well . . . we hope it'll be daily but . . . you know how it is

Emanuel wins Chicago mayoral race; changes name to Daley

2011-02-23T12:57:00.000-06:00

Rahm Emanuel, former White House Chief of Staff for President Barack Obama, has been elected mayor of Chicago and, in a bizarre twist, has announced a name change.

Immediately upon learning of his victory, Emanuel thanked his supporters and his opponents then stunned well-wishers and members of the press alike as he announced that he was changing his name to Richard R. E. Daley, stating, "The name Richard Daley seems to have some pretty good hang time around here and I'm looking to stick around awhile."

When contacted for a comment, his friend and former employer, Barack Obama, said, "Well, that's all well and good but there's no way in hell I'm changing my name to George B.O. Bush."

More news as this story develops.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me . . .

2011-02-22T07:34:00.000-06:00

Cool stuff.

It ended as I said it would, not as I wanted it to end

2011-02-07T09:46:00.000-06:00

As I predicted before the first game of the NFL season, the Green Bay Packers are the world champions, beating my beloved Pittsburgh Steelers, 31-25.

It was a good game. The Steelers played well and they played poorly, too. Too many penalties on special teams plays, 3 critical turnovers and a Keystone Kops Kaper on the game-ending 2 minute drill.   Not so good.

I believe that, in the next few days or weeks, we'll hear more about Ben Roethlisberger's injuries (foot, shoulder, knee) and we'll come to realize that Troy Polamalu was a true non-factor throughout the playoffs because of his achilles tendon injury which may require off-season surgery.   That's just speculation on my part and certainly those statements are not meant to be excuses of any kind. The Packers won; they outplayed everyone down the stretch. Kudos.

Gathers no moss??!!??

2011-02-01T08:21:00.000-06:00

Jack LaLanne goes out fighting like a real man would

2011-01-24T07:41:00.001-06:00

Jack LaLanne, America's greatest fitness guru, has passed away at the age of 96. As is fitting for a man of his repuatation, Jack did not go without a fight.

In a knock-down, drag-out affair with Blind Joe Death, LaLanne had the Grim Reaper on the ropes in an arm-wrestling contest with a healthy 3-1 lead in a best-of-7 match when his Super Juicer, which Jack's lovely wife of 51 years, Elaine, had been feeding constantly with tomatoes, carrots, celery, rhubarb, apples, broccoli and quinces for Jack's between-bouts nourishment, blew a circuit-breaker in their condo. Jack was forced to contend the final three arm-wrestling matches in total darkness and without benefit of his life-sustaining juice.

But rest assured, men of America . . . up until the very moment that the Angel of Death slapped Jack's wrist to the table for the fourth and final time, Jack LaLanne was healthier than you, felt better than you, had led a more fulfilling life than you and, with all certainty, had had more sex in his 96 years than you'll ever dream about having in your pathetic little life.

Jack LaLanne, you see, was a man. Bottoms up, Jack!

The Oddcast is here

2011-01-20T20:00:00.008-06:00

Click on the link below Chuck. The Oddcast is in there somewhere. Hope you enjoy.

The Oddcast, No. 1.

Oddcast No. 1 Set List

Laura Nyro & LaBelle - I Met Him on a Sunday

The La's - There She Goes

Nick Curran & The Nitelifes - Let the Daddy Hold You

Selena - Bidi Bidi Bom Bom

Lucky Peterson - Jody Got Your Girl and Gone

Bo Diddley - Mr. Krushchev

Delbert McClinton - Shotgun Rider

The Raveonettes - Love in a Trashcan

Bob Dorough - Don't Think Twice

The Mooney Suzuki - Oh Sweet Susanna

The Cocktail Slippers - Heard You Got a Thing for Me

Dan Reeder - Clean Elvis

Levon Helm - When I Go Away

Shawn Colvin - Viva Las Vegas

Butch Walker - Going Back - Going Home

Buckethead - Sketches of Spain (For Miles)

Mink DeVille - 'A' Train Lady

Jan Bradley - Mama Didn't Lie

Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds - Dig, Lazarus, Dig!!!

Amy Rigby - Dancing with Joey Ramone

Pete Molinari - I Don't Like the Man I Am

Dave Mason - Here We Go Again

The Verbs - Burnt Out Star

The Stereos - Sweet Pea's in Love

Ray Wiley Hubbard - Wanna Rock and Roll (Live)

And last but not least . . .

2011-01-20T09:53:00.001-06:00

You'd think that in their hometown they'd have gotten better billing. Do you think Chris Montez and Tommy Roe tell their grandkids about the time they got top billing over The Beatles? (Hey, I would!)

What I haven't written lately

2011-01-17T13:29:00.000-06:00

Haven't posted in awhile. The new year is upon us and I am feeling uninspired.

[Cue: Traffic / Shoot Out at the Fantasy Factory ~ (Sometimes I Feel So) Uninspired]

I've sat down and tried to write something in this stupid little blawg but nothing seems to flow. Ah, well. Keep on keepin' on.

I've thought about writing about:

My NFL predictions and how they turned out (not bad, but I'm no Swami).
My NFL post-season awards (MVP = Troy Polamalu).
The Golden Globe Awards, both pre- and post-broadcast.
"True Grit" (helluva movie).
A typical morning in a south Texas hunting blind.
A treatise in defense of bottled water.
My various rejection letters (emails) from literary journals.
My new iPad.
Sports Illustrated vs. ESPN the Magazine
Movie posters I have known and loved.
Why I'll never vote for Kinky Friedman (or anyone of his ilk) again. (But I still love ya, Kinkster.)
Writer's block and the things I've thought about writing.

File this under "cheap excuse for a blawg entry" and don't ever read it again.

R.I.P. 2010

2011-01-04T14:32:00.000-06:00

The year 2010 is behind us and, like all years, it took a good number of people with it, making them permanent members of our past. As is the custom in Marimba-land, we'll take a look at those we've lost:

David Mills, 46 – writer and producer of The Wire, The Corner, Homicide, NYPD Blue.

Art Clokey, 88 – animator who created Gumby

Chris Haney, 59 – invented Trivial Pursuit

Miep Geis, 100 – protected Anne Frank and preserved her diary

Charlie Wilson, 76 – funded Afghan resistance (Charlie Wilson’s War)

Morrie Yohai, 90 – invented Cheez Doodles

Joe Rollino, 104 – Brooklyn 150 lb. strongman

Danny McDevitt, 79 – last Dodger pitcher to win a game at Ebbets Field

Don Van Vliet a/k/a Captain Beefheart, 69 – musician, artist, eccentric

Morris Jeppon, 87 – flew on the Enola Gay

W. Willard Wirtz, 90 – former Secretary of Labor, last surviving JFK cabinet member

Bud Greenspan, 84 – chronicled Olympic efforts on film

Glen Bell, 86 – founded Taco Bell

Alex Anderson, 90 – created “Rocky & Bullwinkle” and “Crusader Rabbit”, the first animated series created for TV

Allen Dale June, 91 – one of the last 3 WWII Code Talkers
Paul, 2-1/2 – octopus who correctly predicted the outcome of all World Cup matches
Leonard Skinner, 77 – teacher who gave a bunch of Jacksonville kids their band name
John Babcock, 109 – last surviving Canadian WWI veteran
John Shepherd-Barron, 84 – invented the ATM
Eileen ‘Didi’ Nearne, 89 – British WWII spy in France at the time of D-Day; captured, escaped from Nazi prison camps
Donald Frey, 86 – designed the Ford Mustang

H. Edward Roberts, M.D., 68 – inventor of the first personal computer, the MITS Altair

Doris Travis, 106 – last of the Ziegfeld girls

Moishe Rosen, 70 – founded ‘Jews for Jesus’

Ken Brown, 70 – was a member of The Quarrymen along with John Lennon, Paul McCartney and George Harrison and a member of The Blackjacks with Pete Best

Clifford S. Kachline, 88 – former historian for the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown and founder of Society for American Baseball Research (SABR)

Shirley Bell Cole, 89 – radio voice of Little Orphan Annie
Roy Pinney, 98 – prolific photographer, author, TV producer, last surviving journalist to cover the D-Day landings, wherein he was wounded

John DuPont, 72 – millionaire murderer

Yertward Mazamanian, 85 – “Eight Fingers Eddie”, prototypical American hippie ex-pat, lived on the beach at Goa, India

Jenny Wood Allen, 99 – oldest female marathoner, last run at age 90

Edith Shain, 91 – nurse recipient of WWII-end Times Square kiss in iconic Eisenstaedt photo

Bill Millin, 88 – D-Day bagpiper, armed only with a dagger in his sock, played his pipes as the beaches were stormed
Emmeline Blakley, 97 – just about the nicest lady you’d ever want to meet

BUSINESS/POLITICS/SCIENCE/SOCIOLOGY

Freya von Moltke, Robert A. Mosbacher, Charles Mathias, Howard Zinn, John P. Murtha, Phillip Martin, Gary Lee, Stewart Udall, Gen. Frederick Weyand, Alexander Haig, Judge Sylvia Pressler, Sam Hamilton, Allan Kornblum, Edgar Wayburn, Andrée Peel, Doris Haddock, Charles Moore, Liz Carpenter, Harold W. McGraw, Eugene Allen, Jaime Escalante, Les Line, Coots Matthews, Anatoly Dobrynin, Dorothy Height, Daryl Gates, Walter Hickel, Lech Kaczynski, Max Palevsky, Harry Stein, Nico Smith, Robert C. Byrd, Dolph Briscoe, Juanita Kreps, Jim Bohlen, Clara Claiborne Park, Ted Stevens, Dan Rostenkowski, James J. Kilpatrick, Robert Gundlach, William Saxbe, John Freeborn, Edwin Newman, Harold Dow, Pastor David Martinez, William Coblentz, Frederick Jelinek, Howard Brodie, Clinton Manges, Murray Sayle, Johnny Edgecombe, Melvin Powers, Ted Sorensen, James Mann, Harold P. Ford, David Nolan, Steve Posner, Elizabeth Edwards, Richard Holbrooke, Fred Hargesheimer, E. Gene Smith

SPORTS

Art Rust, Alastair Martin, Nodar Kumaritashvili, Bobby Bragan, Tom Brookshier, Bill Dudley, Carl Braun, Dick McGuire, Fred Schaus, Jim Bibby, C.R. Johnson, Mosi Tatupu, Bob Biniak, Willie Davis, Henry Wittenberg, Merlin Olsen, Wayne Collett, Kit Horn, Cliff Livingston, Chet Simmons, Mike Cuellar, Juan Antonio Samaranch, Ron Fimrite, Kevin Restani, Arthur Mercante, Jim Pagliaroni, Robin Roberts, Ernie Harwell, Stan Jones, Jose Lima, Dorothy Kamenshek, John Wooden, Les Richter, Kay Cowher, Nelson Stokley, Charlie Wedemeyer, Manute Bol, Raymond Parks, Bob Sheppard, Don Coryell, George Steinbrenner, Ralph Houk, Clint Hartung, Jack Tatum, Billy Loes, Antonio Pettigrew, David F. Dixon, Bobby Thomson, Johnny Bailey, Joe L. Brown, Harold Connolly, Anton Geesink, Ron Kramer, Philip Hoffman, Bent Larsen, Cal McLish, George Blanda, Maury Allen, Larry Siegfried, Clyde King, James Fuchs, Maurice Lucas, Roy Skinner, Sparky Anderson, Artie Wilson, Quintin Dailey, Ron Santo, Davie Niehaus, Wes Santee, Steve Boros, Lew Carpenter, Ed Kirkpatrick, Fran Crippen, Gil McDougald, Don Meredith, Bob Feller, Phil Cavaretta, Walt Dropo.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Eric Rohmer, William J. Lederer, Jean Simmons, Robert B. Parker, Erich Segal, Pernell Roberts, Louis Auchincloss, Zelda Rubinstein, Louis R. Harlan, Frances Buss, J.D> Salinger, Aaron Ruben, Ian Carmichael, Phil Harris, Dick Francis, Kathryn Grayson, Lionel Jeffries, Andrew Koenig, Ruth Kligman, Corey Haim, Nan Martin, Peter Graves, Fess Parker, H.M. Koutoukas, Robert Culp, June Havoc, John Forsythe, Corin Redgrave, Dixie Carter, Eddie Carroll, Dorothy Provine, Lynn Redgrave, Allen Sillitoe, Dick Giordano, Helen Wagner, Frank Frazetta, Peter O’Donnell, Callie Angell, Allan Manings, David Durston, Louise Bourgeois, Dennis Hopper, Himan Brown, Gary Coleman, Rue McLanahan, Joseph Strick, Peter Orlovsky, David Markson, Al Williamson, Jose Saramago, Corey Allen, Wu Guanzhong, Elliott Kastner, Ed Limato, Israel Hicks, Ilene Woods, Harvey Pekar, Tuli Kupferberg, James Gammon, Vonetta McGee, Maury Chaykin, John Callahan, Bernie West, John Aylesworth, Maurice Hines Sr., David L. Wolper, Patricia Neal, Lorene Yarnell, Paul R. Rudd, Edward Kean, Gloria Winters, Jackson Gillis, Robert Schimmel, Clive Donner, Thomas Guinzburg, David Dortort, Claude Chabrol, Kevin McCarthy, Harold Gould, Barbara Holland, Glenn Shadix, James Bacon, Larry “L.A.” Johnson, Stuart Hample, Arthur Penn, Tony Curtis, Greg Giraldo, Gloria Stuart, Gerald Lesser, Stephen J. Cannell, Norman Wisdom, Barbara Billingsley, James Wall, Simon McCorkindale, James P. Hogan, Bob Guccione, Tom Bosley, Johnny Sheffield, James MacArthur, Lisa Blount, Jill Clayburgh, Lamont Johnson, Charlie O’Donnell, Bill Erwin, Oscar Brockett, Charles Reynolds, Ingrid Pitt, Dino De Laurentiis, Coleman Jacoby, Norris Church Mailer, William Self, John Leslie, Denise Borino-Quinn, Leslie Nielsen, Mario Monicelli, Irvin Kershner, Hillard Elkins, Garry Gross, Elaine Kaufman, Fred Foy, Blake Edwards, Steve Landesberg, John Warhola, Janine Pommy Vega.

MUSIC

Teddy Pendergrass, Jay Reatard, Mick Green, Willie Mitchell, Tony Clarke, Kate McGarrigle, Carl Smith, Robert ‘Squirrel’ Lester, Bobby Charles, Brian Keitz, Ed Thigpen, Lynn Taitt, Pauly Fuemana, Art Van Damme, John Dankworth, Dale Hawkins, Doug Fieger, Lee Freeman, T-Bone Wolk, Mark Linkous, Lolly Vegas, Big Tiny Little, Ron Lundy, Alex Chilton, Herb Cohen, Lesley Duncan, Rockie Charles, Jerry Adler, Charlie Gillett, Johnny Maestro, Cherie DeCastro, Keith Elam, Marva Wright, Herb Ellis, Jim Marshall, Hank Stone, John Bunch, Malcolm McLaren, Deven Clifford, Peter Steele, Mississippi Slim, Bo Hansson, Susan Reed, Walter Sear, Lena Horne, Bob Mercer, Dave Fisher, Hank Jones, Ronnie James Dio, Esther Mabry, Slim Bryant, Judy Lynn, Marvin Isley, Crispian St. Peters, Jimmy Dean, Dana Key, Ingeborg Schober, Tony Peluso, Gary Shider, Bill Dixon, Jim Pugliano, Lattie Moore, Pete Quaife, Fred Anderson, Bill Aucoin, Harold Cowart, Debra Jo White, Harvey Fuqua, Sugar Minott, Billy Rhodes Porter, Dick Buckley, Hank Cochran, Andy Hummel, Fred Carter Jr., Al Goodman, Ben Keith, Phillip Walker, Margaret Ann Rich, Mitch Miller, Derf Scratch, Martin Drew, Jack Parnell, Catfish Collins, Abbey Lincoln, Leon Breeden, Herman Leonard, Esteban Jordan, Nancy Dolman, Richie Hayward, Herman Leonard, Michael Been, George David Weiss, William P. Foster, Kenny Edwards, Steve Fowler, Mike Edwards, Irwin Silber, Carlton King Coleman, Tony West, David Fanshawe, Buddy Collette, Eddie Fisher, Buddy Morrow, Dick Griffey, Tony Thibodeaux, Albertina Walker, Solomon Burke, Joan Sutherland, General Johnson, Ari Up, Gregory Isaacs, Jerry Bock, Aram Schefrin, Jim Clench, Tom Winslow, Peter Hofmann, James Moody, Ernie Mae Miller, Jimy Rogers, Clay Cole, Glen ‘Capo’ Adams, Lina Romay, Teena Marie, Bill Maddox, Bernie Wilson, Dorothy Jones Johnson, Myrna Smith, Billy Taylor, Mean Gene Kelton, Agathe von Trapp, Woolly Wolstenholme, Nick Santo, Bobby Farrell.

...............................................................

Let us not forget.

Happy New Year.

2010 in review: The Marimba Awards

2010-12-30T10:01:00.008-06:00

May you live in interesting times, indeed. What a year. And now it's time for the 10th (or 11th) Annual Marimba Awards, "honoring" the efforts of some of our finest and foulest citizens. Without further ado and before the final adieu, here we go . . .

The Marimba Awards for 2010:

Person of the Year: Lisa Murkowski, successful write-in candidate from Alaska.

Runners-up: Sam Calagione, Steven Slater, Ken Ward Jr., Dave Bing, Luis Urzula, Betty White.

Villain of the Year: BP Chemical

Runners-up: LeBron James, Gen. Stanley McChrystal, Joran van der Sloot, Jeff Zucker, TSA screeners, Umar Farouk Abdulmatallab, Terry Jones, Bethany Storro, Tillikum, Toyota.

Sportsperson of the Year: Manny Pacquiao

Runners-up: Drew Brees, Maya Moore, Cliff Lee, Joey Votto, Kevin Durant, Lindsey Vonn, Graeme McDowell, Zenyatta, Tim Lincecum.

Babe of the Year: Sofia Vergara

Runners-up: Katy Perry, Mary Louise Parker, Helen Mirren, Kate Beckinsale, Valeria Golino, Jennifer Taylor.

Fun Couple of the Year: Jay Leno & Conan O'Brien

Runners-up: Al & Tipper Gore, Andrew Breitbart & Shirley Sherrod, Aaron Rodgers & Tony Kornheiser, Armando Gallarage & Jim Joyce, Brett Favre & Jenn Sterger, Stewart/Sanity & Colbert/Fear.

Musician of the Year: Butch Walker

Runners-up: Lady Gaga, Erykah Badu, Jimmy Fallon as Neil Young, Cee-Lo Green, The Nationals.

Prisoner of the Year: Liu Xiaobo.

Runners-up: Lindsay Lohan, Bradley Manning, Wesley Snipes, Takaru Kobayashi, Lil Wayne.

Spouse of the Year: Mark Souder
Runners-up: Tony Parker, Jesse James, Shelley Malil, Any cast member of "The Real Housewives of (insert location here)".

Medical Condition of the Year: bed bug bites.

Runners-up: Hexavalent Chromium poisoning, concussions, the Seven Year Itch, anything treatable by medical marijuana.

Drug of the Year: Salvia.

Runners-up: Methylhaxanamine, clenbuterol, antiretrovirals, Niaspan.

The Paris Hilton Skank of the Year Award: Miley Cyrus

Runners-up: Snooki, Taylor Momsen, Jesse James, Courtney Love (we may have to rename this category in honor of Courtney next year).

Misunderstood or Miscreant: Albert Haynesworth, Colton Harris-Moore, Julian Assange, NaOnka Mixon, Randy Quaid, Kanye West.

People Who Just Need a Good Punch in the Nose: Tiger Woods, Gordon Brown, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Charlie Sheen, John Gruden.

The David Caruso Bad Actor Award: Robert Pattinson, either Wilson brother, most Baldwin brothers, Ralph Fiennes, anyone on "Entourage" whose name isn't Jeremy Piven or Kevin Dillon.

The Rebecca Pidgeon Bad Actress Award: Piper Pirabo, Cameron Diaz, Allyson Hannigan, Heather Locklear, Sarah Jessica Parker.

Dead Yet?: Abe Vigoda, Fats Domino, Gordon Lightfoot, Queen Elizabeth II, Newsweek.

Funny People: Ty Burrell, Ardi Rizal - the smoking baby, Ricky Jervais, Double Rainbow Guy.

Unfunny People: Will Ferrell, Seth Rogen, the cast of "Rules of Engagement" except for David Spade.

Interesting Career Path Changes: Joachin Phoenix - from rapper to ruse; Christine O'Donnell - from witch to politician; Rex Ryan - from football coach to foot fetish videographer; LeBron James - from hero to villain; Eliot Spitzer - from Client No. 9 to TV commentator; Mark McGwire - from retired stonewaller to re-employed, contrite apologist; Conan O'Brien - from Tonight Show host to George Lopez's warm-up act.

Good TV: Modern Family, Luther, The Middle, Lost, Justified, Arliss Howard in Rubicon, Boardwalk Empire, Dexter, Shark Tank (OK, sue me! I liked it.), Terriers, Katy Perry's Sesame Street cleavage, Louie.

Bad TV: Hawaii 5-0 2.0, Lone Star, Michael Weatherly in NCIS, Sports Nation, Outlaw, The Decision.

Not Gay?: Oprah Winfrey, Elena Kagan, James Franco, Michael C. Hall, Condoleezza Rice, Javier Bardem.

Catchphrases of the Year: "Vajazzling"; "Dude, you have no Quran!", "Release the Kraken!", "Mama Grizzlies", "The rent is 2 damn high", "There's an App for that".

Quotes of the Year: Joe Biden: "This is a big fucking deal!"; Marion Berry: "In politics, you shouldn't do outrageous, stupid stuff."; BP chairman Tony Hayward: "I want my life back"; LeBron James: "I'm gonna take my talents to Souf Beach."; Nancy Pelosi: "We have to pass the bill so you can find out what's in it."; Christine O'Donnell: "I am not a witch", airline passenger John Tyner: "If you touch my junk, I'm gonna have you arrested!"

Signs that the Apocalypse is Upon Us: The vuvuzela drowns out everything at the World Cup; Lady Gaga wears an entire ensemble - dress, shoes, hat, purse - made of meat to the MTV Video Awards; an Icelandic volcano disrupts air traffic worldwide; media coverage given to weddings and betrothals of people like Chelsea Clinton and Prince William.

Coming next: R.I.P. 2010 . . . those we've lost in the past year.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-23T07:56:00.000-06:00

Hang a little music on your tree this year at Christmas. It's a great way to enjoy the holidays.

Merry Christmas!

I am in mourning; Capt. Beefheart is dead

2010-12-20T13:47:00.014-06:00

Dammit. Here I am, doing another pseudo-obituary of one of my personal heros. Pretty soon, I'll be accused of stealing my friend Gary's act [RIP Renfield / http://www.riprenfield.com/]

Coming on the heels of Blake Edwards's passing comes the sad news out of California that Don Van Vliet, the artist also known as Captain Beefheart, died last Friday from complications of multiple sclerosis at the age of 69.

Shit.

Don was a Capital A Artist, a man of no compromise, a musician of rare talent and a master with paint brush and canvas. His songs, rooted in delta blues, harmolodic free jazz and nursery rhymes . . . and lord knows what all else, pulled no punches and asked no quarter.

He definitely was not everyone's cup of tea but for those who got it, those who dug the path he trod, he was a man of vision and talent who would influence generations to follow. His mark can be found in the music of acts as diverse as Nirvana, Pere Ubu, The White Stripes, Burning Sensations, Tom Waits, Public Image Ltd., Was (Not Was), Mofungo, Talking Heads, Devo and dozens and dozens more.

I had actually been saving my $$, targeting the purchase of an original Don Van Vliet sketch but, now that Don's gone, the dead artist economic syndrome kicks in and his works have now tripled in value, moving them well beyond my range. Oh, well. I still have the albums.

Damn. I already miss him.

. . . and I quote the man himself: Oh, woe-is-uh-me-bop, om drop a rebop, om.

Another good one, gone.

2010-12-17T14:06:00.008-06:00

Blake Edwards died. I'm sad. Truly.

Loved his stuff.

The Pink Panther. The Great Race. The Days of Wine and Roses. Breakfast at Tiffany's, 10, Victor/Victoria, etc., etc. And my favorite, S.O.B.

I think I'll be sliding the DVD of S.O.B. into the player tonight and settling back for some laughs.

So long, Blake. Thanks for the laughs.

Pfizer offers to rebuild Metrodome roof

2010-12-14T11:04:00.004-06:00

The Metropolitan Sports Facilities Commission, owner of the Minneapolis Metrodome, is reportedly in conversations with pharmaceuticals manufacturer Pfizer over the funding of the repair of the roof of the domed stadium after its collapse this past weekend due to accumulated snowfall.

It is reported that Pfizer has offered to pay full costs of the reconstruction as well as the repair of any damages caused by the failure of the roof. This move, in lieu of funding the repairs with insurance money, would save the Commission hundreds of thousands of dollars in future insurance policy premiums. However, there appear to be a few stumbling blocks in the negotiations.

The drug company wants the stadium to be renamed The Viagra Dome and wants the new roof to be made from a reinforced polyethylene composite rather than the current Teflon fabric roofing material. The new roofing material is to be dyed purple to match both the color of the Vikings uniform and the color of Viagra. The synthetic roof will be sturdy enough to guarantee against the likelihood of any similar collapse in the future yet will be flexible enough that it can be expanded vertically to a height of nearly 150 feet above the stadium's walls. Current ownership has objections to this last stipulation calling it "an unneccesary phallic display that would do nothing but titillate and invite mockery."

A spokesperson for Pfizer said, "Hey, you can just call me a spokesman if you want."

They did it to me again

2010-12-07T08:24:00.006-06:00

I don't know why I am surprised when I read a press release announcing that one of my favorite TV shows has been cancelled.

It happens all the time. Without delving too deeply into the memory banks, I can think of "Life on Mars", "Keen Eddie", "The Unusuals", "New Amsterdam." All personal faves, all gone within the span of a single season.

Now I find that FX has cut "Terriers" from its lineup, citing extremely low ratings and defending its lackluster promotion of the show. Whatever.

This was a good one. Never to return. I doubt that there'll be some huge grass roots groundswell email campaign to keep it afloat. It will disappear, only to surface in 2 years in the DVD bargain bins at Costco or Sam's Club. I'd recommend you pick it up if you see it lying there next to the Disney cartoons and Zumba workouts. It'll be the best $7.99 you'll ever spend.

College Bowls, football and otherwise

2010-12-06T07:30:00.013-06:00

The college football bowl game match-ups have been finalized and, of course, thanks to the clueless cretins behind the Bowl Championship Series (BCS), we really won't have a football champion at the end of it all, come July 10, 2011.

Without belaboring the fact that every other collegiate sport has a playoff system to determine its champion (Correct me if I'm wrong on that.), we get to see a couple of undefeated teams go head-to-head in a supposed title game while another undefeated team and several very good teams with only one loss duke it out on the proverbial sidelines to see who 'also ran' the fastest.

Having said my peace, let's check out some of the bowl games and their pairings:

Best non-championship, BCS bowl game: Wisconsin vs. TCU in the Rose Bowl.

Best non-championship, non-BCS bowl game: Michigan State vs. Alabama in the Capitol One Bowl in Orlando, FL.

Worst non-championship, BCS bowl game: Oklahoma vs. Connecticut. The Big Least (I used to hate it when people referred to The Big East by that name but now I've come to accept it for the accurate commentary that it is.) sends another team to the slaughter. Sure, I've got sour grapes because my WVU Mountaineers aren't playing in this game -- check WVU's track record vs. Oklahoma -- but, still, this one stinks.

Best Corporate Sponsored Bowl Game Name: The Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl (Nevada vs. Boston College), San Francisco. What? Free admission if you bring canned goods?

Revered Bowl Game that's lost its one-time glory: The Cotton Bowl (Texas A&M vs. LSU), Dallas. Nobody cares about the Cotton Bowl anymore.

The "How'd They Get Here?" bowl game: The New Mexico Bowl (Albuquerque), BYU (6-6) vs. UTEP (6-6).

The "Which Big Time Conference's Also-Ran is Better?" bowl game: The TicketCity Bowl (Dallas), Northwestern (7-5) vs. Texas Tech (7-5).

The "Will Anyone Other Than Alumni and Family Be Watching?" bowl game: The Humanitarian Bowl (Boise), Northern Illinois vs. Fresno State.

The "I Thought These Schools Were Division II" bowl game: The Little Caesar's Bowl (Detroit), Toledo vs. Florida International.

The "We Finally Made It!" bowl game: The Texas Bowl (Houston), Illinois vs. Baylor. That's right, folks, you read that correctly. Baylor had a winning record (7-5) and made it to a bowl game.

The "Bowl Game That Should Have Been" bowl game: Michigan vs. West Virginia University. I'd have flown anywhere on this planet to have watched such a game.

So, that's it. A few games to ponder. The entire major bowl lineup can be seen at http://www.cbssports.com/collegefootball/schedules/bowls, among other places.

Happy bowling.

The latest Wikileaks target: YOU!

2010-12-01T12:16:00.010-06:00

It appears that the latest target of Wikileaks founder Julian Assange is none other than YOU! And me!

It has come to the attention of the good people here at Marimba Ideas that Assange and his cadre of snoops, spies, whistle-blowers and hackers are hot on the trail of your past as seen through the eyes of the people you went to high school with. (Never end a sentence with a preposition unless you want to.)

Thousands upon thousands of high school yearbooks have been gathered through whatever surreptitious means necessary and have been scanned, annotated, categorized and documented. Now people from all over the world will know what a dork you were in high school and what your classmates thought about you. Your family members will see what a hard-core, stoned-out pothead you really were.

Comparisons between what people have written in the yearbooks of friends as opposed to what they wrote ABOUT those same friends in other people's yearbooks is, to quote one Wikisleuth, "shocking, kinda."

Wikileaks plans to present their embarrassing findings to the world to coincide with fall semester graduation ceremonies throughout the U.S.

Be afraid, my friends; be very, very afraid.

Are you there yet?

2010-11-30T07:53:00.002-06:00

Two birds in the hand are better than . . .

2010-11-29T08:51:00.004-06:00

Young son Marimba declares that choking your turkey(s) is almost as much fun as choking your chicken.

The little peckerhead managed to bag 4 of these (the legal limit) in a matter of 20 seconds or less, 3 head shots and 1 neck shot. Take that, Lee Harvey Oswald!

Wonder what we had for Thanksgiving?

Terriers theme song: Robert Duncan's "Gunfight Epiphany"

2010-11-22T10:49:00.000-06:00

"Terriers" might just be my favorite 60 minutes of television these days. Donal Logue has finally found the perfect vehicle and Michael Raymond-James is near flawless as Logue's sidekick. I won't bore you with show/character details but I do strongly suggest a viewing. And the show's theme song, 'Gunfight Epiphany', is the catchiest TV theme since, I dunno, The Addams Family theme song?

David Letterman smokes Batman!

2010-11-19T12:30:00.002-06:00

What the trail-cam saw

2010-11-15T11:30:00.006-06:00

I found several photos of this little fellow on my trail-cam this past weekend.

I'd set up the camera along a usually-dry creekbed that runs through our property to see what animals traveled through there. There was plenty of traffic. Lots of does, a few young 6-point and 8-point bucks, a good number of feral hogs plus the odd handful of raccoons and a lone coyote.

This big boy, a nice 10-point and probably a 3 or 4 year old deer, appears daily on the trail-cam. He heads through the area only once each day and never at the same time. He moves quickly; I never had more than the 2 shots of him triggered by the motion detector in the camera that automatically takes 2 photos at 2 second intervals. Most of his activity is after dark or before sunrise but this photo was taken around 9:30 in the morning, last Thursday.

Handsome little fellow, ain't he?

Veterans' Day poppies

2010-11-10T11:08:00.010-06:00

I have few memories of my early childhood years but there's one that comes vividly to mind each year at this time.

I must have been 3 or 4 years old, standing with my mother on Main Street outside the local post office selling Veterans' Day poppies for the American Legion Auxiliary. The poppies symbolized the flowers that grew on the fields of battle throughout Europe in World War I. They were "sold" for donations to the American Legion Auxiliary program, a support group made up of wives and mothers of military vets.

The weather, as I recall, was cold but not unbearable. I was bundled up in my best Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes and my warmest coat. My mother was dressed in what can only be described as 1940s mid-America high fashion, although this was in the mid-1950s. Sure, her coat and dress (always a dress, no slacks, never, not back then) had seen better times but she wore them well. She wore a utilitarian cloth coat that would have made Vice President Nixon proud and, of course, a fashionable hat, pre-Jackie Kennedy pillbox style, sat atop her head, obscuring little of her prematurely greying hair.

Every so often, she'd allow me to run inside the post office to warm up. See, my father worked the counter there. I'd run in, say hi to him, maybe get an AIR MAIL rubber stamp imprint on the back of my hand and then zip back outside to stand with my mother, usually grasping one of her hands tightly and trying to hide behind her coat. We stayed there forever, it seemed, but it was probably only a few hours before we were replaced by another WWII vet's wife.

This was a task that my mother enjoyed greatly and felt to be her duty, the least she could do in support of the good people who served in the military and fought for our country. Our country. OUR country. There was a strong sense of American pride in those days. Not so much, any more. Shame.

The tradition of selling Veterans' Day poppies faded in the 70s, due somewhat to the perception of the poppy as the source of opiates, specifically heroin, but mainly due to the questionable ethics and tactics of the U.S. forces in the Vietnam war. We'd lost faith in our military because of the debatable machinations of LBJ and Robert McNamara and Richard Nixon and Melvin Laird and William Westmoreland and Maxwell Taylor. Seemingly, every soldier erroneously carried some of the blame for the deeds of those in power and paid a shameful price in the public eye. Returning vets from that skirmish were treated horribly, disgracefully. Sad.

I haven't seen poppies sold on the streets since I moved away from my little hometown. I hope that somewhere in this country, that tradition continues. If so, and if you encounter someone on a street corner or in a mall or in some other place of business offering those tiny red paper flowers, dig deep into your pocket and be generous. It won't hurt one bit.